Under Covers
by Annibelle White
Summary: Elphaba thinks she's leaving her friends but instead of staying in the City, Elphaba is sent back to Shiz to use her connections there to assist Rebellion. One of her assignments? Get closer to a certain prince to get more information on the West. The Rebellion is planning a takeover. Elphaba is planning to help. What she isn't planning, though, is to fall for her target. Fiyeraba
1. Chapter 1: A Change in the Weather

**Chapter One: A Change in the Weather**

"You were at Shiz?" The old man asked.

"Yes. What does that matter?"

"You only just came to this City, right? You haven't dropped out officially?"

"No. What are you getting at?" Elphaba had found the Rebellion quickly. Thanks to Dr. Dillamond, she knew what questions to ask and what answers to give when questions were asked of her. And now she was sitting in a dank room with holes in the roof on a chair that wobbled talking to someone she hardly knew.

"You have to go back."

"What? No."

The elderly man grabbed her hand, his face deadly serious. "Yes. We have a cell there, but it is a small one. We need people there, people no one would suspect. You'd be perfect. Go back."

She'd already said goodbye to her best friend. In her mind, she was already long gone. The decision had been a hard one, and now he wanted to send her back? "I don't think that's a good idea."

"There is a man there. He runs the alchemy shop. As soon as you can, you must seek him out. Ask him about the weather. He will say it is unpredictable. You must answer that you think you see a tornado on the horizon. He will know what to do. He will give you further instructions."

"But…"

"But nothing! Go!" The man rose from his chair and pointed at the door. "And I'm sure you know this, but if any of your little friends ask, this meeting never happened. Now return to Shiz. You're of more use to us there, young lady."

Elphaba stammered a goodbye and walked out the door. She considered staying in the City, but she had nowhere to stay and she doubted the old man would be forgiving if she came back. Helping the Rebellion was what she wanted. Maybe this wasn't exactly the way she wanted, but she'd figure it out.

Sighing heavily, she hailed a carriage. "Shiz," she told the driver.


	2. Chapter 2: Damage Control

**Chapter Two: Damage Control**

After a moment of what appeared to be surprise, Glinda pulled her into a tight hug when she walked back in the door. It was late in the evening. "Elphie! What…?"

She cut her off, having spent the ride back thinking of excuses to give her. "I'm sorry. I just needed a few hours. That spell they put on us made me foggy. I don't remember much. I didn't mean anything I said." Elphaba stepped out of the hug gingerly. "About that, though… did you tell anyone?"

"I only just got back this morning. I told Nanny and Nessa, but I haven't figured out how to tell everyone else, Elphaba. You are so lucky you dragged me to the City during the Fall Holidays or we'd have a lot of explaining to do. Nanny was much more understanding than I expected, actually."

"I need to see Nanny and Nessa. Now." She needed to do some damage control before things got worse. Hopefully Nanny hadn't written her father or gone to Madame Morrible yet. "We can talk about this more when I return. I wouldn't want Nessa to be too upset over nothing." She didn't give Glinda a chance to continue talking before she burst into Nessa's room. "Nessie…"

"Fabala?" Her sister's eyes were red, as if she'd been crying. "I thought… Glinda said…"

"The Wizard put a spell on us. I wasn't myself. It took me some time to snap out of it. I have no idea what I thought I was doing. I am so sorry, Nessie, for worrying you. We never should've gone to the City in the first place."

"What in Oz possessed you to do such a thing, Elphaba?" Nanny demanded, standing up from beside Nessarose. "You had everyone worried sick!"

"I was overwhelmed with grief after what happened to Ama Clutch. It was a stupid thing to do and I regret it. Please don't tell Father."

"I already told him. I have written a letter telling him what Miss Glinda told me about you abandoning her, but I hadn't gotten to send it today. I did write him days ago to tell him you left for the City with no warning whatsoever. I'm sure there will be consequences."

Those were consequences she could bear. "And Madame Morrible?"

"I hadn't notified her yet of your trip, although given how close she is with the Wizard, I'm sure she knows or will know soon. And I didn't want to discuss your school situation with her until I'd discussed what to do with your father. So no, she does not know."

Elphaba took a deep breath, relief taking hold. "Thank Oz. I am so sorry. I don't know what else I can say."

Nessa glared at her. "Do you have any idea what you put me through? I thought I'd lost my sister! That was the most selfish thing you could have ever done."

"I know, Nessie. I wish I hadn't. I love you, dear sister, please don't hate me."

"I need time." Her sister shook her head when Elphaba tried to hug her.

"You should rest. You've been traveling for days. We'll discuss this more later." Nanny waved her back to her room.

Glinda stood with her arms folded across her chest. "You didn't give me a chance to tell you anything."

"I knew Nessa must be dreadfully worried, Glinda. I needed to rectify that immediately. What did you need to tell me?"

"Remember how everyone was going to the Philosophy Club when we left?" Glinda asked, her face darkening, forehead wrinkling as she frowned.

"They really went, didn't they? Those idiots!"

"They did. And Elphaba, something happened there. I don't quite know what, but when they returned, Tibbett had some sort of mental break. He's in the hospital. He won't speak. He just lies there." Tears formed in her roommate's eyes and began to make a path down her cheek.

Elphaba swallowed hard. "I… oh sweet Oz, that's awful." What they had done had been ignorant, but no one deserved that. "Has anyone visited him?"

"Crope has. He's heartbroken. It doesn't look good for Tibbett, Elphie."

Of course it broke Crope's heart. He and Tibbett had always been so close. Maybe if they'd been there, they could've stopped him. She shook her head. That wasn't her fault. They made the wrong decision and it was terrible, but she was not to blame. "What about everyone else?"

"They're a little shaken, but everyone seemed fine when I saw them today. They asked about you. I said you weren't feeling well after the trip. I didn't know how to explain to them…"

"That's fine." That was more than fine. It was great. She had no more explaining to do. "I should never have left you like that."

"You're right. You shouldn't have." Glinda sat down on her bed. "It's been a very upsetting day. I need to rest. I'm assuming you need to, too."

Elphaba nodded. "Yes. Good night, Glinda. I really am sorry."

The next morning, Glinda accompanied Nessa and Nanny to services. No one was suspicious when Elphaba refused to join them - she'd gone maybe twice since Nessa had come to Shiz, and only when Nessa had put up a severe fit. That morning, Nessa had been to cross to bother with her sister, so she stayed behind. She had other things to do, anyway.

Elphaba walked down the roads, unsure of exactly where the alchemy store was. But she didn't want to ask, fearing that it would give her away. Instead she wandered the quiet cobblestone roads. The place might not even be open. Many businesses closed their doors Sunday mornings because of services, though it was certainly a dated practice. Religion had become less prominent in Oz, and for that she was thankful.

Most of the leaves had gone from the trees, leaving thin branches reaching towards the nothingness in the grey sky over her head. Frost had turned the grass a putrid brown only weeks prior. The chill nipped at her skin and she wrapped her cloak around her tighter. She'd need to hurry. Elphaba wanted to be back before everyone returned.

It took another fifteen minutes before she found what she was looking for, squeezed between a bookstore and a small boutique. For a moment, she thought it was closed, but she spotted a small movement in the windows so covered with dirt she'd thought they were blacked out. Cautiously, she opened the door, a bell ringing to signal her entry.

The store was dark inside, lit only by the windows that didn't provide much light in their current condition. But perhaps that was the point. There wasn't much on the walls. Some plant cuttings adorned the shelves, their names scribbled in messy handwriting on pieces of paper beneath them. An old man emerged from what she assumed was a back room and looked at her curiously. "May I help you, Miss?"

"Maybe," she replied nervously. "How's the weather?"

His eyes widened slightly, but the rest of his face gave no indication. "Unpredictable."

"I wouldn't be so sure," she said quietly. "I think there might be a tornado on the horizon."

His lips cracked into a toothy grin. "I see. Why don't you come with me? I have some good roots for weather-related potions here in the back."

Elphaba tried not to think about how vulnerable she was in a gloomy room alone with some old man she'd never met. She was probably stronger than he was, though. He needed a stick to walk. "Of course."

He ambled over and closed the curtains on the door and put up a "closed," sign at the window. She wondered if people could read it from outside. The man gestured for her to follow him into the back.

There were no windows, but there were a few candles lighting the room, though it was no brighter than the main area. She took a seat in one of two chairs at a table. There were no roots back here, but she hadn't expected that there would be.

"Allow me to introduce myself. I go by Kal."

"My name is…"

He held up a hand. "No real names. Think of something else."

"Fae," she said. "I go by Fae."


	3. Chapter 3: Secrets and Lies

**Chapter Three: Secrets and Lies**

After she answered the same questions she'd been asked in the City - questions about her beliefs, her philosophy, how far she would go for the cause and so on - the man got down the business. "You're a student at the University here, right?"

"Yes." She decided not to tell him about her little trip to the City. All that mattered was that she was joining.

"I've been hoping one of you would come in here one day. There aren't a lot of us out here and until you, there hasn't been a single student. We did have a professor once…"

Dr. Dillamond? Could it be? Had he been here? She dared not ask. "Once?"

"He… died."

It had to be. But she didn't want to discuss that with this man, this stranger. "What can I do for you here? I don't understand why you need a student so badly."

"You don't? Have you ever thought about how powerful some of your classmate's families are? And I certainly wouldn't mind having someone keep an eye on that Madame Morrible from within, although I sometimes wonder if that's too dangerous a task, given what happened to…"

"To Dr. Dillamond?" Elphaba asked, unable to keep her mouth shut. "She killed him, didn't she? I knew it!"

"He was your professor, wasn't he?"

"He was my mentor. I know she killed him." But should she reveal what Ama Clutch had told them? Elphaba wasn't sure how much she trusted this man quite yet, and even if he was to be trusted, what good would it do? They knew she killed him. They'd never prove it.

"That's what we suspect, yes. So you understand what you're getting into?"

"I do. I'm willing to do whatever is needed. But what did you mean about my classmates?"

"There are a few we've been keeping an eye on from a far. You, my dear, were one of them."

She wasn't sure she liked the idea that she'd been being watched, but she didn't argue. Of course, she knew why no one had ever reached out to her. It was too big a risk. Though she thought Dr. Dillamond, if anyone, would have trusted her. It hurt her to think he never told her. "I see."

"Then there's Miss Glinda of the Arduennas. Madame Morrible's star pupil and sorceress in-the-making. She comes from a wealthy family up North, I understand. We could use her, but I don't believe she'd be as sympathetic to the cause."

"My roommate," she said softly. "And you're right. Glinda doesn't break rules."

"But it couldn't hurt to have another set of eyes on her. However, she isn't what we need."

"What do we need?"

"The West. Dear girl, we have Munchkinland behind us already. The Quadlings are too afraid of retribution to join our cause, poor things. They've already been abused enough. But the Vinkus is a different story. We need them on our side if we have any hope in this fight. They're skilled hunters and fighters, and when war does finally come, their forces will be strong. I understand there is a young prince that attends your school."

"Prince Fiyero." It had been hard not to notice him. After his unfortunate entrance, he had joined the ranks of the outcasts with her. Of course, with looks like his he stuck out at Shiz, though she didn't find his looks nearly as unappealing as some did.

"We need to sway him. He is prince of the Arjiki tribe. The Scrow will follow the Arjiki, and if both of them join us, the Yunamata will have no choice but to do so, as well."

"How am I supposed to convince him? He probably has no idea what's going on here or in the City."

"Then enlighten him. Make him trust you. Get him to do what you want."

"How?"

"There are ways a woman can make a man do all her bidding. You can't be that clueless."

She had suspected that was coming, but she'd been hoping she was wrong. "You want me to seduce him? Me? He's already going to marry some girl from his tribe. And I'm not exactly the most beautiful girl on campus."

"He doesn't have to marry you for you to seduce him, naive girl. And sometimes these things aren't about looks. Besides, he's new here. I'm sure he would welcome a friend."

"I don't even know how," she protested.

"You said you'd do what you had to. This is what we need you to do. Get him under your spell and then guide him to our cause. You'll figure it out."

"And if he doesn't do what we want?"

"He'll have an unfortunate accident. He has brothers. And there are two other tribes with princes, you know."

"You'd kill him?" Elphaba was horrified. "But he hasn't done anything wrong."

"Whatever is necessary for the greater good, Fae. But perhaps it won't come to that. If you don't want him dead, it would behoove you to do your best here, no?"

It dawned on her that this plan was too well thought out. "You've had this planned long before I walked in here. What if I hadn't come?"

"We knew you would, eventually. And we have a few people deployed to the Vinkus, getting the lay of the land, so to speak. We need to know if the feelings are there. The Wizard has treated them like barbarians. I doubt they're very fond of his regime. But we need to sway the ones in power. Maybe we could do it without you, but there'd be a bit more bloodshed."

Though she didn't know the young man very well, she wasn't pleased with the idea of him being killed for a cause he knew nothing of. And who knows what sort of things she'd have to do in the City, anyway. She'd been willing to do anything, give up anything for this. The environment changed, but her feelings hadn't. This was the only way she could make a difference. Dr. Dillamond would've wanted this. "Fine. I'll see what I can do. Is there anyone else you want me to keep an eye on?"

"Other than your roommate? For now, no. But I need to keep an eye on _you_. You're to stop by once a week."

"I don't need a babysitter."

"You said yourself you don't know what you're doing. If you encounter trouble, I want to know about it. And I have another small assignment for you." The old man stood up and went to the wall and began counting bricks.

"What else do you need from me?"

"A translation." He found what he was looking for and pulled a brick out of the wall, reaching in. He handed her a dusty leather bound book.

She opened it and squinted at the scribbles on the page. "This… I don't understand this…"

"You take sorcery, correct?"

"Yes."

"This is the language your spells are in. There might be a familiar word here and there. What you have there is a spellbook, but we have no use for a spellbook when we can't read it. The more sorcery you learn, the better you should be able to understand these spells. This is ancient magic, probably very powerful."

"You have no one who knows sorcery?"

"No. Most of our people never went to University, and that is the only place where students are allowed to learn such a thing. Like I said, we've been waiting for a student to walk in for a long time."

"You say 'we' a lot, but you're the only one here."

"We're everywhere, Elphaba. We're in Munchkinland, in the City, everywhere. There are just very few of us in this place. And it's best you don't know who anyone else is. If you get caught, the only one you can give up is me."

"I don't intend to get caught," she said, and she meant it.


	4. Chapter 4: Moving Forward

**Chapter Four: Moving Forward**

Elphaba didn't waste time. She approached Fiyero after life sciences the next week. "Have you heard anything about Tibbett?"

He was putting his things into his knapsack and didn't look at her. "They're thinking of sending him to a mauntery, one of those places where nuns care for the hopeless cases. At least that's what Crope told me."

"How is Crope?" She asked. "I feel so terrible. I should've tried harder to stop everyone."

"We were drunk. No one would've listened," he shrugged. "Crope is a bit despondent. He's been pretty focused on school. It's been hard to get him to talk, and he's usually incredibly chatty."

"That's awful. And you, Fiyero? How are you doing?"

He looked at her for the first time since she'd started talking to him and she saw anger in his eyes. "I feel like an idiot for going along. I know we're all curious, but there are better ways than what happened…" Fiyero shook his head, his black hair falling along his forehead.

She took a risk and put a hand on his shoulder. "What did happen, exactly? I don't mean to pry, if it's something you'd rather not talk about. But if it's something you do need to get out, I'm willing to listen."

He looked around the lecture hall. "It's certainly not something that we should discuss here. But yes, I wouldn't mind talking about it. It was pretty disturbing."

"Glinda has another class this afternoon. We can talk in my room, if you'd like." That had been her plan, of course. She'd have to make sure to lock the door between rooms or Nanny could come in, but she wasn't too concerned. Nanny only checked in on them around dinner, and they had a few more hours before that.

As they walked towards her room, Fiyero said, "We haven't had much of a chance to talk just you and me."

"I know. It's been a bit crazy this semester. I've wanted to get to know you a little better, since you're new to our little group, I just haven't had the chance. It's unfortunate the circumstances…"

"I'm glad you want to get to know me. I don't really have a lot of friends."

Good. He was lonely. Maybe this wasn't an impossible task. "Neither do I. For me it's really Boq and Glinda."

"Crope and I were friends, but like I said, he's not quite himself lately."

"I can't blame him. He and Tibbett had a special relationship."

Fiyero opened the door and held it for her as they entered the girls' building. Boys didn't really do that anymore, but she supposed it was different in the Vinkus. "You don't have to talk around it, Elphaba. I know they were lovers. It was hard to miss."

"You're right," she said, grabbing her key to unlock her door. "Just in here." Elphaba closed the door behind them. She sat herself on her bed and invited him to sit beside her.

He seemed uncertain about that and bit his lip.

She realized she was being too forward and that being so obvious was not going to help her cause. "Sorry. I didn't mean to make you uneasy. In Munchkinland everyone is very close. Personal space doesn't mean much out there." She hoped he never asked Boq about that, because it was a blatant lie. "You can grab my chair if you want."

"Ah, I understand. I didn't mean to seem like I'm afraid of you or anything, it's just uncommon." But he sat beside her anyway. "I should behave like everyone else. People already think I'm odd enough as it is."

"You're not odd, Fiyero. You're just different. Different isn't always a bad thing. I'm different, too, you know."

"I noticed," he smiled.

She noted the way he seemed almost intrigued by her skin, the way his eyes ran over her body. Elphaba wondered if she should reach out to him again, but decided that she'd put herself out there enough for one day. "So what happened at the Philosophy Club, Fiyero?"

He lowered his eyes, then. "It was fine at first, just some dancing, a little bit of nudity, but then they brought us into the next room. Boq didn't want to go, and I wasn't sure what was about to happen, but Avaric… he thinks he can handle anything and before we could say anything, it just happened."

"What was in there?" She made a mental note to kick Avaric where it would hurt him most next time she saw him.

"It was like a stage. They separated us, which was when I realized this was a bad idea. I should've figured it out earlier, maybe…"

"It's not your fault," she said gently. "I couldn't stop you earlier and you couldn't have stopped anyone, either."

"I think there was some kind of drug in the air. Everything got lighter, hazy. Then they called some people up, Tibbett was one of them. There was a woman and a Tiger with him. They had them smell something else and undressed them."

Elphaba felt uncomfortable just listening to the story. "I don't like where this is going."

"I think you can tell what happened next, then. I don't feel right saying."

"Poor Tibbett," she murmured. "And you, what a way to be introduced into our culture. I swear that's not how things are around here. Everyone was just curious. I doubt any of them have ever done something like that before, even Shen-Shen and Avaric."

"Oh, I'm sure some of them have done some things, but I doubt they've done them with multiple partners or with a Tiger." He grimaced.

"Well, it is University. There's nothing wrong with curiosity and even with acting on it, but what you're talking about sounds more like drug-induced rape."

"He was barely conscious for some of it. Part of me thinks the drugs are part of what made him catatonic." Fiyero shuddered.

"It's possible he got too much. But you don't need to think about that. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have asked."

"No, I'm glad you did. I needed someone else to know what happened. None of us have talked about it. It's almost like there's some sort of silent agreement not to. But I know that everyone thinks about it, and not in a nostalgic way."

"I can imagine that some of those images would be seared into your brain." She put a hand over his, and not because she was trying to make him like her. Elphaba genuinely felt like he needed comfort. It wasn't something she did often, but the poor young man looked so lost. "You tried to get me to come with that night."

"If I had known, I wouldn't have even asked. I wouldn't have gone at all."

"I know. You didn't realize what that place was, did you?"

"I thought it was just a club with dancers and strippers. Maybe a brothel at the worst."

"And you were willing to go to a brothel?"

His face flushed with embarrassment. "Not to participate. I was just curious what it was like inside. And like I said, I really thought it was just dancers. I'm not going to lie, I wasn't averse to watching a few women remove their clothes. I was also drunk."

"I know, I know. I didn't mean to imply anything." She pulled her hand away.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to accuse you of thinking that. It's been a weird few weeks." Fiyero leaned his head against the wall her bed was pressed up against. "It doesn't help that I've been struggling in some of my classes. I can understand it when I read it, but some of the professors talk too fast or they have accents that I can't understand."

She saw an opening there. "I could help you. We can meet twice a week in here or in your room and I can go over anything you had trouble with and you can copy any notes that you miss. We're in a lot of classes together. I don't mean to brag, but I'm a fairly good student and I keep pretty high marks in all my classes."

"You're very smart."

"So are you. It sounds like you're just having trouble with the teaching methods, not with the material."

"I would like it if you helped me. I could use it. At least for right now."

She was glad he had taken the bait. "Great. We'll meet here once a week after class. Is there another time that works for you?"

"After Ozian histories? Or do you have another class after that?"

"No, that works."

"We can study in my room. Crope has another class that morning and then one right after lunch, so sometimes he doesn't come back at all until much later. And I'm sure he wouldn't mind if he did come by and we were studying."

"That's perfect. I'd ask if you want to study now, but I think maybe you need some time. So later this week after histories?" Elphaba stood up.

He got up and headed towards her door. "Yes." Before he opened the door, he turned to her. "Thank you, Elphaba."

She should be thanking him. He was making this too easy.


	5. Chapter 5: A Little Bit of This

**Chapter Five: A Little Bit of This, A Little Bit of That**

"Where have you been?" Glinda asked her several days later. "Your class was over hours ago."

"You've memorized my schedule? That's not creepy." Elphaba muttered.

"You're very stuck in your ways. You study at the same time, go to the library at the same time, it's hard not to get into a routine."

"Perhaps I'll have to be more unpredictable, then."

"Are you going to answer my question or just continue to make smarmy remarks, Elphaba?" The blonde put her hands on her hips.

She was glad Fiyero couldn't see through her like Glinda could or she'd be in trouble. "After what happened, I asked Fiyero how he was doing. He's new and I thought he was probably traumatized. I also wanted to know exactly what went on. We got to talking and he told me he's having a little trouble understand some of his foreign professors so I offered to go over my notes with him sometimes. We were studying."

"That's sweet of you. I hadn't thought to check on him, but you're right. He seems very nice. Is he upset about everything?"

"He's a little shaken up, like everyone else."

"They're moving Tibbett to that mauntery for lost causes today." Glinda said quietly.

"I know. Crope is Fiyero's roommate, so Fiyero knows just about everything in that regard. Apparently Tibbett's parents don't want him to have any visitors once he's moved. Crope isn't handling it well."

"They never approved of that relationship," Glinda observed.

"I know, but if Tibbett were himself and were able to say so, he'd want Crope there. That should be what matters most right now." Elphaba sighed.

"I wonder if things would've been different if we'd been there."

"Maybe. We'll never know. I've asked myself that a few times this week, but it's a useless question." Elphaba sat down on her bed. "I'm just glad Nanny wouldn't less Nessa go."

"Thank Oz for small miracles," Glinda agreed. "I can't believe she wanted to go at all."

"She swears she doesn't remember asking to go. I think she's just ashamed of herself. It was actually nice to know she's capable of being bad." Elphaba laughed.

"Fiyero asked you to join them, remember?"

"Yes, I do. I think he worried that if we didn't all go, no one would go. I think he regrets that now."

"He seemed very interested in you going," Glinda pressed.

"He was very drunk, just like everyone else."

"Do you think he likes you? First he asks you to go with them, now you two are studying together."

"I offered to study with him, not the other way around," Elphaba reminded her. "And no. Don't forget, he's supposed to be married back home."

"That doesn't automatically mean someone doesn't have feelings."

"I would know. My mother had a lot of feelings, even though she had my father."

"That's not very nice of you to say, Elphaba."

"It's very true," she snapped.

"Well, it's not what we were talking about, anyway. We were talking about Fiyero. Do you like him?"

"No." Elphaba was getting frustrated.

"That's too bad. You two would be kind of cute."

"And kind of impossible. Now leave me be, will you? I need to do some studying of my own."

She met with Kal again that Sunday. It was easiest to meet then because she wouldn't be missed, especially since Glinda apparently noticed her every move. And it was also easier for Kal to close the store at that point, since many local stores were closed then. "Have you made any progress on the book?"

"You were right. When I looked closer, I was able to pick out a word here and there when I sounded them out. We never wrote down any spells. We're expected to memorize them after hearing them a few times, so I had no idea what any of the words looked like. I've started to keep a notebook of the spells I learned in sorcery class."

"That's a good idea. What words are you finding?"

"Fire. Move. Fate. But that's all I've gotten so far."

"Keep working on it. What about your other assignment?"

"I've befriended him. He needed some help in class so we've been studying together. But he's a sweet young man. I don't see him doing anything against his little arranged marriage."

"Have you ever been to the Vinkus? Learned anything of their people?"

"No. I've been to Quadling Country, but that's it."

"They don't see marriage the way we do, Fae. It's simply a bond to create children. People carry on outside of their marriages all the time, and they don't even try to hide such things. Perhaps your friend is not as innocent as you think. Many boys out there have had experience by your age."

She couldn't imagine that Fiyero would, but what did she know? "I see."

"Is this something you have a problem with?"

"No, it's just… not where I thought I'd be useful." She didn't like that she was doing this merely because she was a woman.

"You are useful in many ways, like the book. That won't be your only assignment. But right now, we don't know you that well. I need to know you are serious about this. I can't just give you a gun or a spell and send you to create chaos somewhere."

"I understand that, but Dr. Dillamond was making so much scientific progress and I studied alongside him. I could continue that," she protested.

The old man held up a hand. "That has been covered. And that information is very sensitive. If the time comes, I may ask you to do such work, but we are not there yet. Work like that needs to be done far away from the prying eyes of the Wizard or Madame Morrible, as we learned the hard way."

That much was true. If Morrible ever found out what she was up to, she'd be in danger. Perhaps it was best that such important research took place far away from Shiz. She just wished she could be a part of it. "If that's how it has to be. But please keep me in mind if another pair of eyes becomes necessary for that work. I'd be glad to assist in that. I was his star pupil, and I realize I haven't even graduated, I like to think I was helpful in that research."

"I'm sure you were. I assure you I will not forget your request. But right now we need you here. Once you've graduated, we can discuss options. Back to Shiz, though, have you seen anything? Are there any rumblings of something Madame Morrible might be up to?"

"I haven't heard much, but I've been a little engrossed in my other tasks."

"You need to learn to multitask better, Fae."

"I multitask very well, but I have other responsibilities outside of my multiple assignments for you. If you want me at Shiz, I actually need to pass my classes, you know."

"I think we both know that passing your classes is not a problem for you. Passing them with perfect marks is what you're more concerned about."

"I want to learn as much as I possibly can. I don't see anything wrong with that."

"I wasn't trying to tell you that it was wrong, Fae. Look, you seem to be doing fine for the moment. I'll see you next week. Keep it up."

As she headed back to her room, Elphaba rubbed her temples. This was starting to get overwhelming.


	6. Chapter 6: Mixed Signals

**Chapter Six: Mixed Signals**

"How did you do on the quiz today?"

"How could I know? He hasn't graded it yet." Fiyero raised his eyebrows at her.

"You know if you struggled. Did it feel difficult? Was it easy?"

"There were a few questions that made me pause, but for the most part I think I didn't do too badly. But the lesson afterwards was somewhat confusing."

Elphaba stretched out on her bed, scooting slightly closer to him. "What did you find difficult?"

"Aside from focusing while sitting next to you?"

"Excuse me?" Was he trying to say what she thought he was trying to say? How was she supposed to respond to that? Elphaba wasn't sure if this was flirting, and she wasn't sure where he was going with it.

"I'm sorry. That was out of line. I just meant that…" He bit his lip.

"Why would I make it hard to focus?" If he was trying to tell her anything, he was going to have to say it straight out. She wasn't good at reading signals.

"I feel this pressure to do well because you're so good at everything. That's all." But his eyes flicked away from hers.

"Right. That's what I thought you meant. I just wanted to clarify." Her voice didn't sound like her own. It sounded high and nervous.

"Anyway," he stammered, "I was a little confused on the concept of evolution. It started out in a way I understood, but suddenly I had no idea what he was talking about. I'm starting to feel stupid."

She smiled at him encouragingly, "You aren't. I told you. I think it's just hard enough that you're being taught in your second language. All the accents from the professors that came from all parts of Oz to teach here are just throwing you off. You will adjust. Someday you won't need me."

"I hope not," he blurted.

She looked at him questioningly. "Why?"

"I like spending time with you. You… you're my friend."

"Of course that's what you meant. I knew that." Maybe she just needed to do this herself. If she didn't, they might never get anywhere. She was not a patient person, which might pose a problem here. But if she did do this and it went badly, she might not be able to recover herself and he might not want to speak to her again. That was a big risk. And if this went wrong, it could mean his life. Elphaba was not ready to make that bet. "Back to the topic, of course. You understand what evolution is in broader terms, right?"

"We went over it when I was home-schooled in the Vinkus. But not in depth."

"Do you know why evolution happens?"

"Not quite."

"Well, sometimes it's an accident, a mutation or variation. But that mutation, for some reason, benefits that species and so it becomes a part of that because they are the ones who survive. And over time, those little mutations completely change the species."

"That makes sense."

"Good."

"So Animals are probably just evolved forms of animals?"

"Now we're getting into a theory that hasn't been confirmed or tested. But that is one of the theories, yes."

"What are the other theories?"

"Some people would like us to believe that the opposite is the truth, that animals evolved from Animals because they did better without speaking and complex emotion. I don't believe that to be true."

"It can't be. It makes no sense."

"You're right. But Fiyero, in these times, that's a political statement. You can't go saying that in class, do you understand?" But inside she was smiling. It was a small step, but he was starting to see things her way. And she hadn't even had to guide him to that conclusion.

"Why? How is that political? It's common sense."

"In the City, and some other places, Animals are considered second-class citizens. The idea that they are an intelligent species would upset those who aim to repress them."

"Why repress them?"

"I don't know, Fiyero. That's what I don't understand. Maybe people are threatened by them, or it makes them uncomfortable because they are different."

"And the rest of Oz is fine with this?"

"The rest of Oz doesn't quite know how bad it is. And a lot of people who do know don't care because it doesn't affect them. There are people who care, but there aren't enough of them to make a difference." This conversation was going in a direction she liked. She realized that relating to Fiyero on their differentness would be exactly how to get to him. "I think it matters to me because I'm not normal, and it scares me to see other creatures who are considered abnormal being abused."

He glanced down at himself, then at her. "But there are so many differences among people, skin color, gender… why is it the Animals we choose to have a problem with?"

"Because there are less of them? Because their non-evolved forms are lesser beings? I couldn't tell you, Fiyero. Maybe if I knew, I'd understand it better. I don't think I want to be able to understand it, though."

"And how does the Wizard hide all of this?"

"He controls the two big newspapers in Oz, from what I've heard. He has people everywhere." She thought of telling him that Madame Morrible was one of them, but she didn't want to get too intense just yet. "They help him keep it quiet with lies and silence."

"This is true? All of this is happening? How do you know?"

"I saw it. And I had a professor who taught me. I've learned to read into things. But I can't prove it to you. If you don't want to believe it, you don't have to." This was the time to take a risk. She didn't want to force the thoughts into his head. He would resist. He had to think for himself, and if he trusted her, he'd believe her.

"I'm not doubting you. I know you're too smart to believe conspiracy theories. I was just wondering how you found out when you said that it's been kept quiet. The more you say, though, the more I start to piece things together, things I've seen and heard. You're right."

She'd hooked him. Elphaba silently thanked him for not making her spell it out for him or have to push him to listen. He'd figured it out for himself. "You're smarter than you think you are, Fiyero." And she meant that.

"Thank you. I think I needed to hear that."

"But maybe we should get back to the topic of evolution, Fiyero. Political policy isn't going to get you good grades. In fact, here, it would probably hurt you."

"Good idea. I need to focus. You seem to make that so difficult for me."

There it was again. Elphaba wasn't sure how to act on it, so she merely ignored it. She was aware she was going to have to figure out how to handle it sooner or later.

She asked Kal about it the next time she saw him. The old man laughed. "And you just pretended he hadn't said anything?"

"What was I supposed to say?"

"You should've said you felt the same. And then if he asked you to explain yourself, you could make him say so first. At which point he might be more likely to take the risk of telling you what he actually meant."

"And you think he actually meant that he likes me?"

"Yes! He made at least three comments insinuating such. When you said you weren't good at this, I didn't think you could be this bad."

"I'm sorry, but given my looks, I'm not usually a target for flirting."

"Well, that is exactly what he was doing. And you need to reciprocate or you'll get nowhere. You told me he was a little shy. He's not going to just come out with it! I think he understands that you might be a little hesitant to engage with him given his marital situation, and he's not going to push it."

"So I should push it? What if he rejects me?"

"From what you're telling me, I don't think that's going to be a problem."


	7. Chapter 7: Just For This Moment

**Author's Note: I've written this scene a lot, where one of them wants something more and the other is afraid. Except Elphaba's always the one who is afraid and it's always Fiyero telling her to go for it. This time, I switched it up. I like the way the situations I put the characters in change their motivations and their behavior. It flips the script on them and sometimes they just do what they want. One thing I like about fanfiction is that when the original writer's characters are strong enough, I just need to come up with a plot device and the characters do what they want.**

 **Chapter Seven: Just For This Moment**

"Is everything okay, Elphaba?" Fiyero asked her.

"What do you mean?" She knew exactly what he meant. Elphaba had been absorbed in her own thoughts, trying to figure out how to make the next move with him. She was probably no help to him right now in regards to studying.

"You seem distracted."

She saw her opening, only because he'd used the same one before. "You distract me."

That seemed to surprise him. "I do?"

Elphaba understood that while she needed to push, she didn't need to be forward. Instead of saying anything, she merely looked into his eyes and nodded.

"I understand that, believe me."

"You do?" She hated this. She'd always been direct and to-the-point. No wonder she'd had no idea how to flirt.

"Yes. Ever since you started sitting next to me in class, I've been having even more trouble focusing on what the professor is saying." Fiyero's voice was low and soft.

"What makes it so hard?" She brought her face just the slightest bit closer to his, never dropping eye contact.

"The urge to do this." He pressed his lips against hers and slid a hand around her waist.

Elphaba had never been kissed, but she certainly didn't mind it. While she didn't have first-hand experience, she'd seen people kiss before, and instinct began to kick in. Her eyes closed. She slipped an arm around his neck and parted her lips lightly, giving him the opportunity to deepen the kiss, which he took eagerly.

He pulled her against him, the hand on her waist squeezing her skin. The other hand found its way behind her ear, dragging her mouth against his as their lips moved in concert. His tongue wound into her mouth, teasing her. When she tried to tug him back on the bed, he stopped. "Elphaba, we need to talk about this."

"You're going to need someone else to tutor you," she said softly. "After that, I'm never going to be able to focus again."

He laughed at that, but got right back to the topic. "You know I'm getting married in less than two years."

"Why does that matter?"

He looked at her with uncertainty. "It doesn't matter to you?"

She shrugged. "Why should it?"

"You don't seem like the type of person who would do this, Elphaba."

That much was true. She wouldn't be here if she hadn't been told to. At least she didn't think she would. "I'm not," she said truthfully. "But you…"

"I understand. I didn't think I'd be doing this, either. But Elphaba, there isn't a future in this. Are you comfortable with that? Because I'm not sure that I am."

"Just because we can't get married doesn't mean there isn't a future. I don't know what it's like in the Vinkus, but around here people date before they get married. And after? Some people still have affairs, you know."

"And you wouldn't have a problem with that? With being the other woman?"

"That's years from now. I'm focused on right now, Fiyero."

"People will judge you. Maybe me, too."

"People don't have to know."

"I don't know if this is a good idea, Elphaba. I like you. I think I've made that clear. But I don't want to do this when I know where this goes."

"So what? You kissed me and now you're just taking it back? What did you think was going to happen when you did that, Fiyero?" Elphaba demanded. She had enjoyed that kiss, whether she was supposed to or not.

"I wasn't thinking. When you're right next to me on the bed like that, it's hard for me to keep my thoughts in order. I shouldn't have done that."

"You should've. I wanted you to. I'm glad you did."

He closed his eyes for a moment. "I can't do this to you. Or to me. It isn't fair to either of us, Elphaba. What happens if we end up wanting more than we can have?"

"I don't know. We take what we can get. And how is not fair to me? I know what I'm getting into."

"Maybe I should go." Fiyero got off her bed and grabbed his things.

"You can't just avoid me. I'm in half your classes." She folded her arms across her chest. "Fiyero, please. Don't run away from this."

He paused. "You are much more willing to do this than I would've thought."

She didn't want to seem desperate. It wasn't who she was, and she knew that sort of behavior could push him away. But how was she supposed to do this? "I'm surprising myself, too. I don't think I knew I was willing until you kissed me. I was curious, yes, but I wasn't going to do anything about it."

"Which is exactly why I shouldn't have."

"Stop saying that! Saying it doesn't make it true. You can't go back. Face it."

Shaking his head, he put his books down on her desk. "Fine. Elphaba, tell me exactly what you want here."

"You." Because the truth was, she didn't know. But it sounded good enough.

"Why? What are you hoping to get from this?" When she didn't respond immediately, he sat back down beside her. "What I'm asking is if you're looking for something physical from me or something more. You don't seem like the physical type."

She wasn't, though that kiss had made her waver on that. "And you are?"

"I've done my share of experimenting. But not here. Not with someone I care for."

"So you care for me?"

"I do. And I don't think you have any idea what you're getting into if that's all you want from me, Elphaba."

"I want… oh, hell, I'm not sure I'm certain of what it is I want. I don't know what I mean. I'm… I don't… I've never…" Shit. He'd tripped her up and now she was fumbling. She hadn't meant to get vulnerable.

"I didn't think you had. Is that what you want? Because I don't feel right taking that from you if it means nothing."

Why was he such a gentleman about all this? And how had he suddenly turned the tables on her? Now she was the one afraid and feeling uneasy. "I wasn't asking for that."

"Good. Not that I'm not interested…"

"I'm not uninterested, either, but that's not what I'm saying right now." She sounded ridiculous and she hated this conversation. What had she been thinking, pushing this?

"What are you saying? You want to date me? I'd love that, Elphaba, but when people do that it's usually meant to lead somewhere that this can't."

"I realize that. It doesn't mean we can't pretend, just for this moment. Being with you makes me forget all sorts of things. I'm sure we can forget that, if only for a little while."

"And what happens when the time comes that we can no longer forget it?"

"How about we stop thinking about it? Fiyero, this is what it is. I understand that. So do you. What harm can come from it?"

"Heartbreak."

"Fiyero, look at it this way: I've never felt this way before. I don't know that I will again. And the same goes for you. Shouldn't we at least see what it is? Even if it's not forever, we should get our chance. I'd rather have something, even if it's only temporary, then never have anything." That sounded romantic. It almost made her want to gag. Why was she doing this? Was it worth it?

"You have a point."

"We don't have to tell anyone. We'll just spend time together like we have been. We're alone twice a week. What happens when we're alone happens just between us. Maybe we won't go out in public like some people, but I wasn't fond of that idea anyway."

He bit his lip. "You really want this? With all the baggage it comes with?"

"Only if you want it, too."

Fiyero reached out and ran a thumb along her cheek. "I do."


	8. Chapter 8: Rush

**Chapter Eight: Rush**

This time, they were on his bed, and their kisses were getting heated. She had begun to unbutton his shirt, and she could feel the itching in his hands, wanting to explore her body. So she took one of his hands and placed it on her breast.

"Elphaba, wait." He sounded breathless.

"What now?" She groaned.

"I don't want to do this now. I know we don't have forever, but we do have time. You're rushing things and I don't understand why."

Elphaba silently cursed herself. She didn't know exactly why she was rushing, either. It didn't help that she didn't know how these things usually worked. A part of her was nervous, and so she was trying to get this over with. "I'm sorry. If you don't want…"

"Oh, I want. I would not mind devouring you at all. But not yet. I know you don't want to talk about our situation, but you need to think about if you want to do this given that we'll never…"

"What am I waiting for, Fiyero, marriage? Do you see me getting married? Having children?"

He smiled. "No, not really."

"Exactly. But you are right. I am rushing. I apologize. However, I don't want you holding back because you think you're going to hurt me. I can handle myself. It's my decision. If you don't want to, that's yours. Worrying about me, though, isn't going to help."

"That's fair." His hand was still on her breast and he teased it just a little. "Care to explain why you're so eager?"

"Sometimes I get carried away with you." Jumping into bed with him was not going to get her what she wanted. To be able to sway him, she'd need to have an emotional hold on him, not just a physical one. She realized that sleeping with him would only get her one. Elphaba had to pace herself.

Kal was pleased with the progress she was making, but reminded her that this was a long-term assignment. "You may be in this for the long haul. If we don't have him where we want him by the time you graduate, you may need to continue this."

"You want me to follow him out to the Vinkus? Be his mistress?" That sounded like the most boring assignment ever.

"For a time. Until his people are on our side."

"And what happens when he realizes what I've been doing?"

"Everyone else around him will be on our side. He won't be able to change his mind. You'll be gone, but the damage will be done. And then, I promise you, we will send you to work on more sensitive things."

"The goal here is war, right? To take over?"

"Yes. We need his forces. He's not the only option, but he's the easiest to access. I know he's already starting to see things your way, but he needs to be motivated to act."

"I realize that."

"But if you keep pushing him, he'll figure you out. Right now you simply need to focus on getting closer to him. Don't press the politics. Make him fall in love with you."

Love? She'd been bad at flirting, but she'd be worse at this. Then again, she wasn't supposed to love him. She needed to make him love her. While she wasn't sure how to do that, she knew it wouldn't be easy.

It was at this point that she realized her roommate might prove to be more useful than she thought. Glinda was well-versed in relationships and boys. But she didn't want to just tell her roommate she was involved with Fiyero. It was too unlike her and Glinda would know. No, Glinda had to think she'd squeezed it out of her.

Elphaba purposely returned late one evening after spending time in Fiyero's room studying. She thought that would trigger another discussion with her roommate, and she was right.

"You were with Fiyero for a long time today."

She hadn't been with him for hours, actually. After they went over a few things and kissed a little, she'd hidden herself in the library for a few hours. "I lost track of time."

"That happens when you're with someone you like." Her roommate teased.

"Glinda, are we having this conversation again?"

"I'm just saying that you're spending a lot of time with him to not have any feelings there."

"And what if I do?"

"You do?"

"I didn't say that."

"Yes, yes you did."

"There was an 'if.'" But she wasn't as defensive as she usually would be.

"Well, then, _if_ you did, I would wonder how he felt about those feelings."

"And if he felt the same?"

"What are you telling me?"

Elphaba pretended to be exasperated, throwing her hands in the air. "Fine. Glinda, Fiyero and I are seeing one another. We don't necessarily want to tell everyone. He's going to be married when he graduates, which means that we are in a very temporary state. Some people might not appreciate that we're just enjoying time together while we can."

The blonde bounced over to her, clasping Elphaba's hands in hers. "Well, I think that's a beautiful sentiment. I'm happy for you."

"I have no idea what I'm doing most of the time, of course."

"Do you need some advice? I may be single right now, but I've had my fair share of flings."

"I have a feeling you're going to give me advice whether I ask for it or not." And that was exactly what she wanted.

"How long has this been going on?"

"A few weeks. It just sort of happened. We were studying and talking and one day he just kissed me."

"That's so sweet!"

"I wasn't quite sure how to respond to that, but we talked a bit and decided that maybe we should just try. I'm still not so certain, though. I mean, I feel these things for him, and it's different, but I have no idea how to act about it, or even if I want to."

"You don't have to act completely different, Elphie. Just little things. Hold hands when you're talking or lean against him while you're reading from the same book. It doesn't need to be a big gesture."

"Good because I don't like big gestures." That much was true.

"And maybe you don't have to study all the time. You could talk about things that you care about, have real conversations."

"Like we're having right now?"

"Well, not exactly. You don't need to discuss your relationship with him. At least not too much. It sounds like you've already worked out all the kinks. But you could talk about Nessa, and things you did back home. You could find out more about his past, his family and his friends. You can learn so much about each other."

She didn't like to talk about her past. Growing up with her deformity hadn't been the most pleasant experience, and her family hadn't made it easier. But maybe she could use that to her advantage. If she shared things with him that she didn't share with anyone else, it would make him feel closer to her. That was what she wanted, right? "I think I understand what you're saying."

"I never thought I'd be giving you this advice. I'm surprise you told me about this at all."

"Well," Elphaba thought quickly, "knowing you, you'd find out eventually. I figured it'd be best if I controlled how it came out."

"Wise decision."

"But you must promise not to tell anyone, including Nanny and Nessa. I don't think this is going anywhere, Glinda, because it can't. So no one else needs to know."

"I respect that."

"Thank you. I know I don't usually say this, but I really do appreciate your advice."


	9. Chapter 9: Opening Up

**Chapter Nine: Opening Up**

They were discussing genetics when she found the opportunity to open up to him. "Everything we are is passed down from our parents, at least physically," she explained.

"I knew that. I also understand that some of it comes from farther back than that. It may have been in our parents' genes, even if our parents don't necessarily display that trait. It may have been from our grandparents or even great-grandparents. It's not necessarily all our parents."

"Like my skin," she said softly. "I wonder where that came from."

"I never wanted to ask about it, but I did notice that your sister doesn't share your coloring."

"No one in my family does. It could be a mutation. Or an environmental factor. My father always said it was because green is the color of sin."

"You don't believe that, do you?"

"Of course not. But my allergy only gave him more ammunition to that."

"Allergy?"

"Fiyero, have you noticed how careful I am to cover up in the rain? I'm allergic to water." Only her family and Glinda knew that. She didn't like to expose her own weaknesses.

"How…?"

"I don't know. There's never been another documented case, as far as I could find. It was a surprise to my family as well. The first time my mother tried to bathe me, she put me feet first into the water." At this point, Elphaba removed her shoes. "When my right foot touched first and I shrieked, she pulled me back." She always wore slippers in the dorms. Glinda had never seen the bottom of her foot, but she showed him. The skin was eerily smooth, a purplish pink color. It was closer to a normal color than the rest of her skin was.

"May I…?" He reached a hand towards her.

"Yes."

He touched her scar carefully. "Wow. I never knew. That must've been painful."

"I was much too young to remember."

"Then, pardon me if this is a bit personal, how do you bathe?"

"Oil. The less diluted, the better. Sometimes it stings a bit, but it doesn't burn or leave a mark."

"Can you drink water?"

"I prefer not to, but I can. But there's too much of a risk of spilling, which I also found out the hard way." Elphaba pulled the skirt of her dress up and over her thigh, where another small burn was, the size of the tip of her forefinger.

Fiyero looked concerned, and gently ran his finger over her thigh, which made her shudder just slightly. "Do you remember that one?"

She took his hand and drew it away from her leg. "Yes."

"I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to touch…"

"Fiyero, it's fine. I run my hands over it all the time. It doesn't hurt."

"It's just a rather intimate area." He flushed.

She shrugged. "I think you mean it's _close_ to an intimate area. It wasn't like you had the wrong intentions. And even if you did, I'm not sure I'd have a problem." Elphaba tossed her skirt back over her legs, though. For some reason, him touching her scar in a non-sexual way felt more serious than what she assumed sex would. His touch was so gentle and soft.

He put his arm around her and she rested her head on his shoulder. It was oddly comforting. "That must've been a strange childhood," he commented.

"It was. People were confused or afraid. My skin is a mystery, and people don't like things they don't understand. But I hid the water allergy from them. I didn't think it was a good idea that anyone else know. I worried that people might use it against me."

"You really think that someone would do such a thing?"

She nodded. "People can be violent when they feel threatened, Fiyero, and my strangeness is threatening to some people."

"I like your strangeness." He smiled down at her, kissing her briefly.

"Thank you. You're a little strange yourself," she smiled back at him. "Let's stop talking about that. What about your childhood?"

"I had several younger brothers and a sister. Once they were old enough to realize that I was crown prince and they would never get the things I was given, though, they became jealous. I'm the only one my parents sent off to school. I don't think they liked that."

"That's not your fault."

"They didn't see it that way. Only my sister and I are close, mostly because as a girl, she had much less of a chance at the crown to begin with."

"How old is she?"

"She's just a year younger. I wish she could've come out here, too. She's so intelligent. I always thought she was smarter than me, kind of like you are."

"What have I told you about saying that? You are smart, Fiyero. Sometimes you surprise me with the things you say, things I never would've thought of."

He kissed her again. "You surprise me a lot, too. In a good way."

"Did you have other friends or just your siblings?" Elphaba wanted to know more about his past.

"Mostly just my siblings. There were a few servants, girls mostly, who tried to get close to me. But it wasn't because they liked my personality or anything like that."

She raised her eyebrows. "And what happened?"

"Power is a drug to some people, and they do what they can to get close to it. I didn't even realize it at first. But one day one of the girls said something that made it very clear."

She got the feeling that more had happened with those girls, but she didn't need him to tell her that. "I didn't have any friends, either, Fiyero. The reasons were different, of course."

"Here I am complaining about being royalty when you actually had things to struggle with. I feel silly now."

"No, everyone has their struggles, no matter where they were born."

"Well, both of us have friends now. It doesn't matter. And we have each other."

That was too sweet for her to respond to. In a case like this, she supposed she'd make a comment about how corny that sounded, or remind him that they wouldn't have one another for very long, but she bit her tongue. "I just got lucky I got placed in a room with Glinda."

"Like I did with Crope. If he hadn't brought me to dinner that one night, I never would've made any friends."

"I'm sure you'd have find some friends."

"After my entrance during life sciences class? I'm surprised Crope even dared to associate with me after that."

"That was a stupid display. You could've been killed. Dr. Nikidik should've been fired for that." Of course, that would never happen. And maybe she could use that to her advantage. The man had almost killed Fiyero. If he knew what side he was on, it might strengthen his feelings. "But Morrible adores him. Says the Wizard sent him here. After Dr. Dillamond died…"

"You think he's a pawn?"

"He has to be. If you heard some of the things he was saying in class before you showed up. And even now. He has an agenda." The lion cub came to mind.

"I'll have to listen more carefully. I haven't been doing as much listening to my professors lately, at least not in the classes you're in."

"Stop that." Even if she didn't want to push him away, she needed to be herself. "You're too nice sometimes."

"I'm pretty sure that's what I'm supposed to do. This is a relationship, isn't it?"

"I know, it's just… you're…" He was making it difficult to not actually care about him. But she couldn't say that. She kissed him heatedly. "You're too damn good to me."


	10. Chapter 10: Not Another Goodbye

**Author's Note: Another chapter today. Two reasons.**

 **1) Somehow I've almost finished this story. It's probably not even going to be more than 25 chapters. I rushed this story because it needed to come out. Usually I'd take my time and try to plan, but I rushed this even more because I wanted to get back to the other stories.**

 **2) Tomorrow I have an interview for pretty much my dream job: high school English/theater teacher. The next 24 hours are going to be filled with research on interviews for teachers (I've never had an interview for a teaching job, I only just got certified last month) and the school district I'm interviewing for. And then I'm probably going to decompress and have dinner with my friends. I might not post tomorrow, so... here you go.**

 **Chapter Ten: Not Another Goodbye**

As the second semester began, another unpleasant change came to their little group of friends. "Elphaba, Crope's leaving. His parents are taking him out of school for the semester," Glinda burst into the room one afternoon, out of breath.

"What? Why?"

"You know he's been upset since Tibbett. His parents think he needs time to 'destress' or whatever. They're packing him up now. Avaric just told us at lunch."

"But he's coming back?"

"Avaric doesn't know."

"I'm going over there." Elphaba got up.

"I think this is a private thing. I don't know that it's a good idea for you to talk to him."

"Well, Fiyero's his roommate. I can talk to _him_ , can't I?" She grabbed her bag and walked out the door. Elphaba knew Fiyero wouldn't enjoy not having a roommate and he might need company. Who else was going to be there for him?

"Elphaba?" Fiyero answered the door.

"I heard about Crope," she gestured inside where she could see an older man and Crope quietly putting things in a trunk.

He glanced behind him and stepped out of the room, closing the door. "I understand why they're insisting he leave. He hasn't been the same and his grades were miserable last semester. I think he needs some time to process without school and friends and everything else."

"You're probably right. Is he coming back next year, then?"

"He hopes so. But I'm not sure. From what his father said, they might send him to another school where he can make a new start and not have constant reminders." Fiyero sighed.

Elphaba didn't like standing with him in the hallway like this. Too many people could see them. "Is there somewhere we can go and talk?"

"They're almost finished. I expect I'll have plenty of alone time soon enough."

"There's no one else moving in?"

"Not at this point. Next year, maybe."

In some ways she could use that to her advantage, spending more time with him, especially alone and uninterrupted. "I'm sorry to hear that," she lied.

At that point, the door behind them opened and Crope and his father exited the room carrying a trunk. Crope looked at Fiyero for a moment. "It was nice knowing you."

"You'll be back," Fiyero said encouragingly. "You just need time."

"Fiyero's right," Elphaba said.

Crope eyed her and then looked back at his roommate. "What's going on here? Is there a little romance brewing?" His eyebrows raised.

"Stop deflecting. You need to focus on yourself, Crope. We'll see you next year. Please take care." Elphaba hugged him. "I came for you, not for him."

"We need to go, Son. The train leaves in half an hour." Crope's father didn't even acknowledge Fiyero or Elphaba. "Your mother is waiting."

Crope nodded and trudged down the hall after his father. "Goodbye."

They watched him go in silence until his steps down the stairs could no longer be heard. "At least you'll have some privacy," Elphaba said.

" _We_ will have some privacy. We can study here from now on. I know you get tired of Glinda walking in and bombarding us with questions." He stepped back into the room and she followed.

"That's for sure." She sat on his bed. "I'm sorry he left. I know sometimes you feel isolated and alone. Our little group seems to get smaller all the time."

He sat beside her and pulled her into a heady kiss. "I've got you. I don't know what I would do if we hadn't started this."

"Don't say that, Fiyero." Elphaba suddenly felt a little guilty. How would she feel if someone did this to her? Lies and deceit. That's all this was. It wasn't fair to him. "You'd be just fine without me."

"I know we aren't talking about it, but I dread the day I get married and this has to end."

"Please stop."

"I'm just telling you how I feel, Elphaba. I really care about you. Isn't that why we're doing this?" Fiyero took her hands in his.

She couldn't meet his eyes. "Yes. Yes. I care about you, too. But talking about it gets us nowhere."

"I realize that, but you deserve to know how I feel."

"I already know," she insisted.

"You've changed my life. I was so afraid here and I felt like such an outcast and then you came along."

She jumped off the bed. "I… I can't do this."

"Elphaba, what are you doing?"

"No. I can't." Elphaba shook her head and ran for the door. "This isn't right." She ran out of the room without another word, leaving Fiyero gaping in her wake.

"You walked out on him?" Kal sounded furious. Even though it wasn't time for her check-in with him, she'd gone straight there, unable to think of anything else.

"I don't think I can do this. I'm not built for this. I don't understand why you're using me for this."

"Why can't you do this? You're clearly doing well."

"I can't just make him love me and walk away from him. It's going to break his heart. That isn't right."

"One broken heart versus how many dead Animals and sympathizers?" Kal lectured. "I thought you were going to give your all to this."

"I can. Just not like this. I'm smart, let me help that way."

"You need to go back there and fix this. Maybe you will break his heart. But at least he gets to live, not to mention he gets laid."

"He's not getting laid!" She snapped.

"That's what this is about, then, isn't it? You're not willing to do the deed. You'd die for the cause, or so you say, but you're not willing to…"

"That's not it! That part isn't the problem. I can't hurt him like this."

"It's that or he dies and we send someone for his brothers or to one of the other tribes and let them stage take over while his is still in mourning."

"You can't kill him!"

"You knew that was the other option going into this. I'm beginning to this you weren't meant for this cause."

"No, I…" Elphaba buried her head in her hands. "This just isn't what I thought it would be. I thought I'd be doing research, actually helping."

"You are. I don't think you have any idea how important it is that we get the Vinkus on our side. You're lucky we trusted someone so new with such an assignment, Fae. It's been a plan in the making since he began Shiz, we just had no one to send in. I must say, you've done better than I expected. I had _thought_ we got lucky with you. I thought you understood how important this rebellion is."

Swallowing, she looked at Kal, feeling ashamed. His feelings, her feelings, they didn't matter when faced with the greater cause she was trying to help. "I'll do this. I can do this. Promise me he won't get physically hurt when this is all over."

"I can't promise you that. If he joins us in war, it's tradition for the king to fight alongside his people, along with the princes. I can promise we won't hurt him, but I can't promise they won't. That's as much as I can give you. I don't know why it matters to you so much." The old man wrinkled his brow and studied her. "Am I mistaken, or have you actually begun to care for this young man?"

"He was my friend before I started this. I feel protective of him. He's kind and sweet and if anyone deserves this, it isn't him."

"We didn't choose him because of his personality, Fae. We chose him because we need his armies, his power. You need to learn to see him that way. Or don't. Maybe this would work better if you did care for him. Although not too much."

"That's not a problem," she lied.


	11. Chapter 11: No Regrets

**Chapter Eleven: No Regrets**

Glinda went to bed early the next night and Elphaba couldn't sleep. She hadn't seen Fiyero since she'd rushed out of his room, and he was probably feeling pretty lonely. It surprised her that he didn't follow her or seek her out after the fact. Perhaps he was too hurt.

She stared at her books by the small light on her desk, reminding herself that sometime in the next few years she'd be working on Dr. Dillamond's research and helping the fight against the Wizard and this would all be worth it. But she couldn't do that without remembering what she needed to do _now_.

Eventually, she gave up and grabbed her bag. She closed the door behind her slowly, praying that Glinda wouldn't wake. That wasn't the hard part, though. The hard part was sneaking into the boys' dorms without being spotted. She climbed through a window on the first floor and took the stairs, hoping that no one was wandering the halls at this hour. Elphaba reached his room unnoticed and knocked as softly as she could. She wasn't sure he'd even heard the knocking until the door swung open. Before he even opened his mouth, she pressed a finger to her lips and stepped inside. "Fiyero, we need to talk."

He closed the door gingerly. "I should think so."

She put her bag down and sat down on his bed and began to say what she'd been rehearsing in her head. "I'm sorry. I got scared, Fiyero. I've never felt this way before and I hadn't come to terms with it and you just kept talking. I'm so sorry, Fiyero."

He took a deep breath and sat beside her. "I thought there were other reasons. LIke maybe… Is it because of the temporary nature of our relationship?"

"No, not at all. I want to enjoy every moment with you as much as I can, Fiyero." At that, she kissed him. "I don't want to miss anything." She brought her hands around his neck and pulled him against her.

"Are you asking…?" He held her face inches from hers.

"Yes. I want you, Fiyero. All of you." Her voice was hushed.

He pressed her down onto the bed, kissing along her jawline. "I've thought about this for some time, but I didn't want to push it."

"I would've let you," she murmured back, unbuttoning his shirt. "I don't want to regret missing anything."

"Even if we can never…"

"Fiyero, I told you this before. It's going to be you or it's going to be never. I was never interested in this before, and I don't see it happening again. I might as well get what I want while I can, and you are what I want." She closed her eyes as he pulled her dress over her head and unclasped her bra. Physically, it did feel quite nice, the way his mouth felt on her breasts, his tongue traveling her body, his teeth dragging along the tips.

He pulled off her panties quickly as he kissed his way back up to her mouth. She whimpered into his mouth as his fingers made their way between her legs, teasing her skin. It surprised her to find how much she reveled in the feeling of his hands, of his finger pressing into her, rocking back and forth inside her.

Her hands undid his trousers and tugged his shorts down. She was supposed to be pleasuring him, too. Wasn't that her mission? His skin was warm in her hands and she could feel his blood pulsing. The moment she touched him, he bit her lip gently.

"I want you so badly," he whispered.

"Then take me." Her legs were open for him and her body wanted him so much she pushed the thoughts rushing through her mind aside.

He did. She gasped softly at his first thrust, clutching at his back. Her mind emptied of everything but him, of the way he felt inside her, of each movement of his body, of hers. Elphaba lifted her hips to him, watching him smile as she did so. Fiyero placed his lips against her ear, "You are amazing."

"Mmmm, not in comparision to you," she purred, her nails digging into his flesh. He drove himself into her and each time she felt her body tingle. A sweet bliss began in her belly and she pressed herself against him, wanting more, begging him to go deeper.

He obliged eagerly, making her wonder at how she had never known this feeling before, the way he filled her, made her overflow with ecstasy. Her pleasure grew and she felt it shoot through her veins, making every part of her sizzle with electricity as she moaned.

"Fiyero, sweet Oz…" But she couldn't finish her sentence. She wasn't even sure what she'd been trying to say. Elphaba gave in and closed her eyes, consumed with him.

Sometime later, when her body had almost burned with the fire he'd created in her, he held her against him. She didn't want to move. Her breathing slowly returned to normal, but she still didn't want to come back from that world in which there'd been only him. But her body began to cool and her thoughts returned to her.

"Why was I afraid of that?" She wondered, the question coming out before she realized she hadn't told him she was afraid and she hadn't wanted him to know. She'd barely told herself.

"Because society treats it like it's dirty and wrong and they use fear to keep you from doing it." Fiyero kissed her forehead. "But if that was wrong, I don't care."

"If that was wrong, then I'm a terrible person," Elphaba laughed, "because nothing felt wrong about that."

"If we wake early so you can sneak back, can you stay here tonight?"

That hadn't been her intention, but it couldn't hurt. "Or we could just not sleep. It's a weekend. I can catch up on sleeping later. We could just talk or study or maybe do that again here in a few hours before I go back."

"One taste and now you want it again?" He asked playfully.

"I said in a few hours…" Her face flushed and she suddenly felt wanton. She reminded herself that sleeping with him was her assignment and it was perfectly fine to want to.

"I know. I'm just teasing, Elphaba. I'm willing to do that again as many times as you want whenever you want. I wish I could do that every night for the rest of my life."

She wished he hadn't said that. It made her feel guilty again, but she knew she was doing what had to be done. And Kal was right, at least Fiyero was enjoying himself. It wasn't like she was torturing him to get what she wanted. "I don't think I would complain," she said. "But you have to be king, and I am not fit to be in your bed."

"I think you're more than fit."

"It's not your opinion that matters, Fiyero, though it should be." Elphaba didn't want to talk about this anymore. "What do you do when you become king, anyway?"

"I'll do some traveling to the City at times, like my father did. It's a lot of boring meetings with important people. Of course, my father still spent plenty of time at Kiamo Ko. When he was home in the Vinkus, he was busy with small scuffles among the tribes or passing laws."

"What kind of laws?"

"Little things. Policy."

"Do you have any laws you intend to pass? Any big policies you plan to change?"

"I want more education out there. I had to have a private tutor. I'd like to start a school."

That made Elphaba smile. "That's a wonderful idea."

"You know, you're a good tutor. You could come teach. I could put you up at the castle as part of my decree and maybe we could still spend the occasional night together. I could promise you'll be treated well."

"Fiyero, you can't be serious."

"I'm absolutely serious, Elphaba."

"I don't know what I'm doing when we graduate. That's over a year away. I'm not ready to make that kind of decision." She didn't want to make him a promise that she knew she could never keep. She had plans that didn't coincide with his.

"Think about it. If we're still together and you find that maybe you're not quite ready for a permanent ending, having a mistress is perfectly acceptable for a king in the Vinkus."

"I will think about it. But Fiyero, I would be lonely, you know that. And maybe I want to do something bigger, more important."

"What's more important than teaching young minds?"

"I see your point. But you need to see mine. Plus, we've only been doing this for a few months. Maybe in a few more we won't be interested in this. Thank you for the invitation. I'm not saying yes, but leave it open. We can talk about it again in a year. That much I can promise."

"It was just a thought. It just came to me. That's all."

"It's a nice thought, but you're asking for a commitment I wouldn't make even if you weren't promised to another woman."

"I understand. It's an idea to put away and think about for another time." He relaxed against his pillows. "You told me you spent time in Quadling Country. What was it like there?"

He wasn't subtle when it came to changing the subject, but she was glad he had and didn't fight him. They spent the next several hours talking and telling stories of their childhoods and families. As the sun rose, they explored one another's bodies in the light, discovering more new pleasures. For a moment, it almost felt real.


	12. Chapter 12: No Going Back

**Chapter Twelve: No Going Back**

"I think we should talk," Glinda's arms were folded across her chest when Elphaba entered the room.

"Oh, you're awake. I woke up early and went for a walk. I should've left you a n-"

"Don't lie to me. I woke up in the middle of the night, Elphaba, and you weren't there."

She gulped. "Glinda, you don't understand."

"You're right I don't understand. What has been wrong with you lately, Elphie? First, you leave me and almost disappear into the City. Then you start a relationship that can't go anywhere with a boy you apparently just spent the night with. And now you're lying to me."

"You want the truth?" Elphaba knew what she had to say, and she was going to have to make it believable. And Glinda wasn't easy to lie to.

"What else would I want, Elphie? I'm your friend. Why can't you treat me like one?"

"I'm in love with him, Glinda."

"WHAT?"

"I'm in love with Fiyero. I know I shouldn't be. I know I shouldn't have started this in the first place, but I couldn't help it. I love him." She wondered if she should cry, but maybe that would be going too far. "I didn't think it would happen. Hell, I didn't think it _could_ happen, not to me. And it had to happen here with the one person that I can't have even if he wanted me."

Glinda gaped at her, shaking her head. "I don't know what to tell you."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I haven't even told him. But you're right, that's where I was last night. I didn't mean to lie to you, I was just ashamed."

"And you thought I would judge you? Tell Nanny? I didn't tell her you were gone, by the way."

"I thought that you wouldn't understand."

"I don't. But you're my friend, and your decisions aren't mine to judge. I wish you'd have told me what you were going to do. Elphaba, there are consequences for that sort of behavior."

"I was careful. I did my math. And I'm not stupid. I didn't get caught."

"Not just that. Emotional consequences. You realize it's just going to make it harder when he gets married? What you did isn't just a physical thing. I've known girls who've done that, and when their relationships went sour, it hurt them more because of it. The first person you give yourself to can break your heart in ways no one else can."

She didn't think she had a heart to break. "I know." Elphaba repeated what she'd said to Fiyero the night before. "But I don't know that I'm ever going to have this again and I don't want to regret not doing it, either."

"You've been taking a lot of risks lately, Elphaba, and I'm just worried. He's gotten into your head."

He wasn't the one in her head. "I know. I didn't expect this."

"Neither did I." Glinda sat down. "You're not mad at me for confronting you like this, are you? I was just worried."

"I get that. I would've liked a few minutes to rest before talking about this, but I'm not mad at you. I am tired, though. Can you tell Nanny that I'm not well and let me sleep? I was up late."

"I should think you were. Yes, I'll tell her."

"I appreciate you not telling her that I was gone in the middle of the night."

"I thought about it. I thought you had run to the City or something, but I decided I'd wait until she came to check on us in the morning. I hoped I was wrong. I'm glad I was." Glinda wrapped her in a tight hug. "Get some rest. We can talk more about this later."

Later? What more was there to talk about? But Elphaba was to tired to ask, and she threw on her nightdress and curled up in her bed.

Before she even said hello the next day, Kal came at her with questions. "Tell me you went back to him."

"I did more than that." She sat down across from him.

"Good girl. I assume that went well?"

She hated that her weapon in this fight was her sexuality, but she would use what tools she had. "I don't think how it went is pertinent to our cause."

"Nonetheless, I'm pleased with what you've done. For right now, though, focus on that. Develop your emotional relationship with him. If politics come up, let them. But don't bring it up on purpose. We'll get to that soon."

"I think we're there. Kal, he asked me to follow him to the Vinkus after graduation."

"It must have gone very well after all," he laughed. "I didn't know you had it in you."

She was getting uncomfortable with the conversation. "I told him I couldn't agree to that."

"You should've told him you would."

"He knows me. If I had just gone along with it and gotten all googly-eyed, it might've seemed out of character. I told him it was something we could discuss in the future. I think by now he realizes I'm motivated by things other than love and I have plans of my own."

"As long as you left it open."

"I did. But if he presses it, it's not going to be pretty."

"It will be as pretty as you make it. I understand that you're not trying to fall all over him or act completely different, but you also need to maintain this relationship."

"I will do my best."

"Now, as far as politics goes… there have been some goings-on in the City that our people have informed me of. You could tell him about those, see how he reacts and get a feel for how far he's willing to go."

"What goings-on?"

He handed her some clippings to read. "This is from an underground newsletter. Look it over and then destroy it. You shouldn't be found with it. I'll see you next week."

She nodded and headed back to her room. Elphaba meandered along the streets slowly. She hadn't had time to herself in a few days and a lot had changed. For a moment, she closed her eyes, trying to feel it in her body, but nothing felt different. But what about what Glinda had said? Had her emotions changed? She'd done her best to guard against that, but when she'd been with him it had been so intense. Sometimes she felt like she really did want him, not just physically. But other times she remembered what she was doing and her blood ran cold. It didn't matter how she felt, though, did it? A little fondness for him would only help her keep up the front she was portraying.

"Elphaba," a voice said to her left.

"Good morning," she smiled.

Fiyero looked at her curiously. "You looked concerned."

"I was just thinking about classes."

"Do you want to come back to my room and study for a bit?"

She looked around them to make sure no one was within earshot. "Is that all you want to do, Fiyero?"

"I actually do need help, you know. Elphaba, you do understand that just because that happened doesn't mean that's all I want from you, as much as I may have liked it." He grinned.

"I liked it, too. And I apologize. It wasn't my intention to imply that was all you wanted from me. I do need to get my books." She thought about the papers in her cloak pocket. Elphaba decided she was going to hide them and look at them later. She couldn't risk Fiyero seeing them before she knew exactly what they said. "I'll see you in a few minutes in your room."

Fiyero seemed as though he wanted to kiss her but thought the better of it. "Good. I'll see you soon."

Elphaba welcomed the distraction. Being left alone with her thoughts was becoming less appealing every day.


	13. Chapter 13: Leading Questions

**Chapter Thirteen: Leading Questions**

"I can't get enough of you," he said late one afternoon as he caressed her cheek.

"Really? You're more than enough for me," she laughed. Summer was coming quickly and they only had a month before the semester finished. She'd come over to study, but Fiyero had been doing so well in classes lately that he didn't really need her so much anymore, at least not for educational purposes.

"I never thought this was in the cards for me, Elphaba, this feeling. I didn't necessarily miss it because I didn't know what it was. But I know I'm going to."

"Fiyero, please, we agreed not to talk about that." She didn't mind the reminder, though. Knowing it had to happen made her feel less guilty about eventually leaving him.

He kissed her softly. "I know. I'm sorry. I just… I love you, Elphaba."

She had known that this was coming. At least she had thought it might and prepared herself for it. Elphaba hoped she didn't look as uneasy as she felt. "Fiyero, you can't. We can't."

"It doesn't mean I don't."

"I understand that, my sweet, but love?"

"I didn't ask to love you, Elphaba, it just happened. It shouldn't surprise you."

"It doesn't. I feel the same, Fiyero. But saying it outloud means something more and I haven't because I know it doesn't matter."

"And I hate that. I hate that our feelings don't matter."

"Please, Fiyero, stop talking about this and just enjoy right now. We have another year. That's plenty of time. If you spend all of that time thinking about the fact that you'll have to get married at the end of it, you won't be happy for any of it and I don't want that. Neither of us wants that." The conversation was getting too serious for her liking.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to ruin the moment, it's just frustrating."

"Believe me, I know, my love. But that won't get you anywhere." She sat up. "Let's talk about something else. What are you doing for the summer? Are you returning home?"

He shook his head. "I was told it is best for me to stay here. They think it's best I spend as much time outside the Vinkus as possible before I become king so that I can expand my horizons and meet new people. I think I've done that already, though."

"I don't think your family meant for you to sleep with a green girl."

"I don't think my family cares who I sleep with. Are you staying?"

"Yes. As punishment for my little trip to the City with Glinda last semester, my father wants me to work at the Crage library this summer and help him pay for my last year of school. He's none to pleased with me."

"He'd probably be even less pleased if he knew you'd be spending some of those off-work hours in my bed."

"He might not be pleased about it but I certainly am." Knowing he would be at Shiz with her for the summer made her happy. There was less supervision. Sneaking around would be easier. And being alone hadn't been nearly as enjoyable lately as it used to be. When she thought about her future, her thoughts got jumbled. It would better when this was over and she could stop dreading the things she would have to do. Which reminded her. "I wanted to go to the City for a bit, though, but I won't have time."

"Why would you want to do that?"

"There's been more news. The Gale Force has basically set up a firing squad for Animals who don't go quietly. Many of them are fleeing the City. I just wanted to see it for myself. I want to see how the Wizard gets away with all of this. And I wanted to look at that stupid new road that he's building. He's building two of them, you know, a ruby one, too. And the ruby mines in are Quadling Country. My family has friends there. The conditions have been awful in those mines. They're forcing them to work days at a time for so little pay."

"That sounds terrible. Why don't they resist?"

"They've been so put-upon for so long, Fiyero. I don't think they have the strength. The Quadlings don't have much of an army. They never had time to train one. Munchkinland has an army, but that's not enough to fight this." She stopped there. Elphaba wasn't going to lead him quite where she wanted just yet, but she wanted to plant the idea in his mind.

"You really think a revolution would fix things?"

"I don't know."

"And you think Munchkinland would fight?"

"I know they would, Fiyero. When I went home over the spring holidays, I heard such anger in the streets. If they thought a fight would be enough, they'd do it. But their forces are not strong enough alone."

He was quiet for a moment. "And if the Vinkus joined them?"

"What are you saying?"

"The Wizard has never hurt us, but he has never treated us with respect. He meets with dignitaries from Gillikin and Munchkinland and even Quadling Country all the time. But he sends representatives to meet with us. He doesn't even think we are important enough to warrant a meeting in person."

"That's not a reason to fight a war." Playing Devil's Advocate wasn't the best idea, but if she got to eager, he might see through her.

"But what he's doing to the Animals, to the Quadlings, that is."

"Why would your people care?"

"Because if he abuses people lower than him, what's to stop him from coming after us next?"

She smiled inwardly. He was thinking exactly how she wanted him to. "Take precautions against him, then. Protect your people. You don't have to fight other people's battles, Fiyero."

"They can't fight for themselves."

"I doubt your family is going to be very happy when you come back from Shiz next year demanding a war."

"They will understand when I tell them what's been happening."

"You really think your first move as a king should be to start this?"

He sighed. "I don't know. But it isn't right."

"It isn't right at all. But you can't just dive into this fight without forethought. Maybe you need to do your research and size things up before you make a decision like that."

"I'm going to write home," he said.

"Then do that."

"My father visits the City once every two years, he might have an idea what kind of troops are housed there, what we're up against."

"Good. You have to be smart about this. I don't want you or your people getting hurt, Fiyero."

"You'll get hurt for it, though, won't you?"

"What do you mean?"

"This is what you want to do after graduation? Why you don't want to teach in the Vinkus?"

He knew her better than she thought and that scared her. "It's a part of it. And maybe being a prince's mistress isn't my dream. I love you, Fiyero, and I'm happy right now, but I don't see how that can continue once you're married. I don't want to share you with your country and your wife."

"I can't blame you for that. But it's not about that, really, is it? You want to change things in the City."

"I do."

"And what if I helped you?"

"That's something you need to think about and prepare for. I'm not going to ask you to. It's not your fight unless you make it yours. But if that's what you want to do, I'm not going to stop you." Of course not. She was going to lead him straight into this war. Her stomach dropped at the thought. Arguing with him had made her realize that there was another side, that it could hurt a lot of people, including him. While it was the only thing that would make a difference, war could be incredibly devastating, especially if they lost.


	14. Chapter 14: Gravity

**Author's Note: Since I'm done, I think I'm just going to post the whole thing. It's not fair to make anyone wait. I have stories that are years old that never finished. This one should get its ending now.**

 **Chapter Fourteen: Gravity**

By the end of the summer, Fiyero was certain he wanted to lead his troops into a war. He'd even taken measures to ally with Munchkinland. Elphaba could see an end to this, one she was all too eager for. "He's going to fight. Can't I just leave now? He's right where we want him."

Kal shook his head. "You need to see this through. When the war is over, you can leave."

"The war hasn't even started."

"Exactly. You will go back to the Vinkus with him, like he asked."

"Why? What's the point?"

"Because we need you in that fight, too. Those spells you've been studying? Those are your weapons."

So she was actually going to do something more in this struggle than seduce Fiyero. That was refreshing, not that her time with Fiyero was miserable. She was certainly having her fair share of fun, but why shouldn't she? Elphaba did not, however, relish the thought of going to the Vinkus and becoming his mistress. "I just don't see myself as a kept woman."

"You won't be, not really."

"He knows that's not me, though. I think it might surprise him if I did agree."

"Why did he offer if he didn't think you might go? Tell him you're coming so you can help him change things, be his advisor. And to continue your affair, of course."

She hadn't seen it as an affair, at least not now. But that's what it would be. Elphaba had never seen anything wrong with such things, not after everything her mother had done. She didn't want to be like her mother, though. She told herself that she wouldn't be, not really. Her mother had never wanted anything more than physical release, while she had much larger objectives. "I'm not telling him yet. I need to at least act like I've thought about it more."

"Fair enough. But don't wait too long."

The new year began and Crope didn't return. No one had heard from him and they could only hope he was doing well wherever he was. Fiyero was not assigned a new roommate. The school liked to assign roommates of the same year and no one else had dropped out. There were an uneven number of boys and Fiyero benefited from that. Of course, so did Elphaba.

"I wish you could sleep in here." He told her one afternoon.

"I can't. Nanny would find out. It's been hard enough hiding as it is. And I slept in here plenty during the summer." That she had. Nessa and Nanny had returned to Munchkinland. She was surprised her father had been willing to leave her without supervision.

"And those were the most amazing months of my life."

"You have a flair for the dramatic, Fiyero."

"Are you saying you didn't want to sleep here?"

"I'm not saying that. But we're far too young to know if those were the most amazing months of our lives. They may have been the best up until now, at least."

"You love twisting my words."

"I do. It's a habit." She laid her head against his chest.

"So in doing some of my research, I've heard about this underground group. They refer to themselves as a rebellion."

Elphaba almost choked. "Really?" Her voice came out a squeak.

"Yes. Apparently they do a lot of work in Munchkinland and the City. Have you ever met any of them? You're always going on about things…"

"I've heard about them," she said. "And it's possible that some of the things I hear are coming from them. But I've never met anyone who has admitted to being a part of it. Mostly what I hear are that the Munchkinland forces are getting ready for something. I'd be surprised if the Wizard didn't know. He's probably got spies, too." Change the subject. That's what she should do.

"You're probably right. Why hasn't he done anything?"

"Because a move like that would be very large and very public. Fiyero, you haven't done anything that would get you caught before this starts, have you?" She remembered Kal's promise not to let their side hurt him, but she also remembered how he had threatened that it wouldn't be them she'd have to worry about.

"It's possible. I've tried to be discreet, but eventually he or the Gale Force will find out. But like you just said, I don't think he'd go after me or my people. At least not just yet."

Kal had been perfectly willing to kill him if this hadn't worked out. Then again, the Wizard didn't need to kill for power or armies. He had plenty. "Be careful."

"You're worried about me? Elphaba, you're the one ready to run off and fight him the minute you graduate."

"I don't matter. You do. And maybe I don't want to fight him alone."

He looked at her. "What does that mean?"

"I mean maybe I will take you up on the invitation to teach. It's a good front for helping you with this. It's where I'd be most useful. And as an added bonus, I'd get to be with you."

"And my wife."

"I'm not worried about her."

"I am."

"Don't be. Her only duty is to give you children, right?"

"If something happens to me, so long as she has a child or is pregnant, she's in charge, Elphaba, until my child is old enough."

She wrinkled her nose at that. "Well, we just won't let anything happen to you, then." Maybe that would inspire Kal to protect him, at least until the war ended.

"I don't intend for anything to happen to me, but Sarima needs to at least go along with this. It will be too late to back out once this is all started, though, so I don't know why I'm worrying."

"You're worrying because she'll see me as a threat. You can't hide me, Fiyero. Women aren't stupid. You're very… affectionate, and if you intend to carry on like this, you're going to give it away."

"And so what if I do? It's not illegal."

"No, but some people might not approve."

"My father had affairs. So did my grandfather. He had quite a scandal, actually. But no one ever questioned his leadership skills."

"I'm not going to just be your mistress and wait around for you to come to bed. You understand that. I will teach. I will help you. But I'm not there just for you."

"I realize that."

"This is not how I expected my life to go after graduation. And it's not a permanent thing. You realize that, too, right?"

"When all this is over, you're just going to leave?"

"I… I don't know. Oz might need help to rebuild. I have no idea what state our world is going to be in. And that's assuming we win. If we lose, Fiyero, we'll probably both end up prisoners in Southstairs. Somehow I doubt they'll let us share a cell."

He was quiet, running a finger along her shoulder as he held her. "We're never going to get to be together for real, are we?"

"Probably not. But we knew that going in." He needed to be reminded. She needed to lessen the impact of what was going to happen. If he was ready for her to leave him, it would hurt less when he found out why she'd been there in the first place.

Fiyero buried his face in her hair. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too." She almost laughed at how easily the words came. Either lying was getting easier or… no. Elphaba clung to him for a moment, calming her mind as she inhaled his scent, trying to keep herself grounded. She didn't need him, no, not at all. But she could. And that terrified her.


	15. Chapter 15: The Drums of War

**Chapter Fifteen: The Drums of War**

"I've heard word from our people in the Vinkus that their army is doing some training. The Scrow and the Yunamata have allied together with the Arjiki, just as I thought they would. You've done well."

"I didn't have to do much. He sees our way of thinking without me having to push it. I don't know that you needed me to do what I've done. You could've just asked him."

"That was too big of a risk. We needed to give him another reason."

"I haven't wanted to push him, but why are we waiting until we graduate to march on the City?"

"Because he's not technically king until he returns to the Vinkus and is coronated and his family has made it so he has to graduate from University before he can do so. His people won't follow him if he's not officially their king."

He hadn't told her that. Perhaps he didn't think it was relevant. There were a lot of things she hadn't told him. "I told him I'd join him at Kiamo Ko. How, exactly, am I supposed to check in when I go there?"

"Seek out the innkeeper. But I'm not concerned. You won't need to check in nearly as much. It would look suspicious. And you're at a point where I think you can hold your own. We'll notify you when the time for movement comes and extract you when necessary."

It all sounded so clinical. "And when I'm extracted?"

"The City will need to be repaired. We will need a new regime. Perhaps your connections to the Vinkus will come in handy then, too."

"I'm pretty sure once I'm gone I'll be persona non grata as far as he's concerned."

"Maybe. But your knowledge of the people, their land and their ways could be valuable. There are many ways you could be useful. We spoke before about you continuing Dr. Dillamond's research. That research could begin to healing process in regards to Animal cruelty. If people were faced with the truth, they might realize their minds were poisoned by the Wizard and that Animals are not to be feared or abused."

"I would like that. Dr. Dillamond would've liked that."

"Yes, he would have." The old man paused. "You and Fiyero must have the most interesting pillow talk in all of Oz."

Elphaba cackled at that. "Probably."

"But he's still passing his classes, right?"

"Doing better than ever."

"You're rubbing off on him in more than one way, then."

"I try to keep him focused. It's almost like I'm his babysitter."

"That's basically what you are. He needs you, whether you like it or not. What else is going on around Shiz?"

"Madame Morrible held another of her little poetry readings the other day. One or two students protested outside the building after last time. Most of the people who had intended to come seemed to be scared away by that and she had very low attendance."

"Students at Shiz are more progressive than I thought."

"It's the younger Munchkinland students. Things must really be changing out there. I almost wish I could go home and see it all."

"It's chaos out there right now. Here is the best place for you. What about your roommate? How does she feel about all of this?"

"I honestly don't know. She's more preoccupied with my love life than politics of any sort."

"I see. What does she think of your little situation?"

"She's worried about me. She thinks I'm going to get myself hurt."

"She doesn't suspect anything?"

"She just thinks I'm in love."

Kal studied her for a moment. "When this began, you weren't very good at this."

"And?"

"And I'm wondering how you got so good so quick. Or if there's more to it than that. You're very concerned about his feelings. I know that falling for your target is a risk, but you understand that developing intense feelings for him could jeopardize everything? You can like him just fine, but if you've fallen in love with the young man, we may have a problem."

"I like him. He's a good person. But I don't love him, Kal. I don't fall in love." Elphaba stuck her nose in the air. Sure, sometimes she felt a longing for him, an affection she couldn't explain, but it didn't go so far as love. Fiyero was loving and a great man. Of course she should care what happened to him. A man like him deserved good things. But she wasn't a part of that.

"Good. If you had fallen in love, I don't know what we'd do. You've gotten too far for us to start over."

She knew exactly what they would do, even if Kal wouldn't say it. She'd be eliminated. They'd talked about eliminating Fiyero or eliminating other threats. It wouldn't surprise her if they needed to get rid of her. They'd make it look like it was the Wizard or the Gale Force as a way to push Fiyero into starting the war for them. Elphaba surprised herself by thinking this out. It didn't upset her to know they'd do it, either. She'd die for this cause. It was Fiyero's life she was uneasy about giving. It was one thing to sacrifice oneself, but an innocent person? She wasn't sure she was willing to do that and it could get her in trouble. So far, however, she'd managed to avoid having to drag anyone down with her, but Fiyero was on a ledge willing to jump. Somehow she had to catch him.

"What are you thinking about?"

"I'm thinking about the fact that you know exactly what you'd do if I'd fallen in love with him."

Kal raised his eyebrows at her. "I do?"

"It might not be done by your hand, but yes, you'd know. And you wouldn't blink an eye."

"Clever girl. But that's not a problem, is it?"

"What did I just say? It's not. I feel protective of him, yes, like I do all innocent people who have done nothing wrong. Do I feel slightly stronger because of my relationship with him? Not exactly. I feel strongly because I know him and I know the kind of person he is, not because I'm in love with him."

"Fair enough."

"And Glinda is never going to be involved in this war. One side or the other. When this all comes to a head, she'll hide herself in her parents' home until it blows over."

"I think you're underestimating her."

"She has never expressed a political opinion one way or the other."

"But if her best friend were to fight, you don't think she's loyal enough to fight alongside you?"

"She might think about it, but she's far too fragile."

"I think one day she's going to surprise you."

"Let her. She's a good sorceress, but I don't think she can handle the violence that this war is going to bring. She shouldn't have to. If she runs, I want her safe."

"And if she ends up fighting for the other side?"

"She can fend for herself." Elphaba didn't mean that. But she couldn't imagine Glinda fighting against her, against what was right. If that were to happen, she wouldn't know what to do.

"We'll take measures to protect her so long as she stays on our side or neutral."

"And my sister."

"Your sister is a Munchkinlander. She'll be a part of this. Your family is a powerful family. We can't help that."

"My sister is disabled." Elphaba would not leave Nessa unprotected.

"Physically. Mentally, she is just as capable as anyone else. We cannot protect her. But she will be on our side. I doubt she will be in the front lines. I don't think you need to worry. The war is fast approaching, Elphaba, and you need to be ready."

Fast approaching? She knew there were months until anything could begin. Then again, time could pass quickly. The last few months with Fiyero had gone faster than she could remember time ever passing. "I will be ready. I am ready."


	16. Chapter 16: An Indecent Proposal

**Chapter 16: An Indecent Proposal**

Elphaba had a problem. The spring holidays had ended, graduation was coming near. Fiyero was despondent, constantly complaining about his upcoming nuptials. But Elphaba had more immediate things on her mind.

"I don't even know how I'm going to handle my wedding night, Elphaba."

"You'll make it work," she said distractedly.

"I know that. I just… she won't be you."

"You've done things before me, you'll do them after," she snapped.

"What is wrong with you?" He grabbed her shoulder. "You're barely listening to me and you are sour. Is this about my marriage?"

"Not everything is about you!" Elphaba jumped up and paced the room. "No, Fiyero. This has nothing to do with her."

"Then what the hell is going on here?"

She hadn't intended to tell him. Not yet. There were other people who needed to be notified, plans that needed to be made. She wasn't sure she was ever going to tell him. It could be taken care of without him. But his eyes were so hurt when he looked at her and the truth slipped out. "Fiyero, I'm pregnant."

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I know nothing is foolproof. I swear I did the math right. I'll take care of it. There's a potion. The sooner I take it, the less sick it'll make me, but I'll probably be ill for several days."

"How have I never thought of this before?" He sounded incredulous.

"We've talked about it, but I told you, I thought it was fine."

"No, Elphaba, you don't understand. You're not getting this taken care of."

"Why not? And what makes you think you have any say in that decision?" She demanded.

"Do you remember when I told you about my grandfather having an affair, a scandal? He got a servant girl pregnant, before he'd even consummated his marriage to my grandmother. Tradition dictates that in a case like that, if the father acknowledges the pregnancy is his doing, he has to marry her. Of course, my grandfather wasn't fond of that. He hadn't liked the woman much other than for physical uses. So he drugged her and ended her pregnancy."

"That is terrible, Fiyero."

"You're not seeing the point of the story, Elphaba. If you're pregnant and I haven't consummated my marriage, then I can marry you." He pulled her into a hug and she was grateful he could not see her face.

"No. No. No. No. No. No." She shook her head violently.

"What's wrong? I thought you wanted…"

"I need some air. I'm sorry. Please just let me have a few hours? This is just a bit much between the pregnancy and what you just told me. I promise I won't do anything about it until we've talked some more."

"It shouldn't surprise me that you're not jumping into my arms. Yes, go ahead, take your time. If you need more than a few hours, that's fine. But this is wonderful news, Elphaba."

She merely nodded at him and fled his room, practically running until she reached the alchemy shop. It was late and the store was closed, but she knew Kal lived above the store and she banged on the door until he opened it, holding a candle and looking upset. "We have a very serious problem. I need help now."

He didn't say anything, only led her into the back room and let her do all the talking. When she finished, he merely smiled at her. "This is an unexpected development."

"You think?" Elphaba was struggling to hold back tears.

"It's actually quite a blessing in disguise."

"How? I can't marry him, Kal!"

"You can and you will. Do you understand that you are carrying the heir to his throne? If something should happen to him, you can raise that child to do exactly as we want while holding the title of Regent. If I had known this would be what happened, I would've urged you to do this months ago."

"I didn't do this! It was an accident. You can't actually expect me to do this. I'm not a wife. I'm not a mother. And what happens when this is all over? I can't just leave him if I've married him and had his child."

"Being married doesn't mean you have to live with him or even love him."

"I'm pretty sure that's what he thinks it means. You're not understanding what I'm saying. I've done everything you told me to. I befriended him. I got closer to him. I gave him my virginity. I pretended I loved him. I made him love me. I cannot marry him. I can't keep the charade up if you make me do this. Playing the role of wife and mother? That's beyond my capabilities."

"I think you know that your capabilities are much more than what you thought they were. And what if I told you that you don't have to play mother?"

"What are you saying?"

"Deal with it. After you've married him. Tell him it was a miscarriage. I'm guessing he wants to marry you soon? It won't be too painful to wait a little to handle this problem. You're right about playing mother. That would get in your way and I worry it might change you in ways you can't see right now. Your priorities will change. We can't have that. But you marrying him? When you disappear when this is all over, he can find a new wife and have children. He doesn't need to know where you are or why. We could fake your death, if that's what you want."

"This is too much right now."

"I realize that, but you need to act now. The longer you make him wait, the more he starts to doubt the way you feel."

She didn't even know how she felt! "My father will kill me."

"Your father doesn't need to know you're pregnant. If you take care of it early enough, that is. He'll just think you fell in love and got married."

"You're asking me to live with him. I can't do that. I'll never debrief, have time alone. I'll snap."

"You will find a way. You are strong, Fae."

"And then you want me to lie to him? Take away his child? You're asking me to trick him into marrying me."

"He loves you and he wants to marry you. It's more like tricking his family into letting him marry you."

"You don't think it'll break his heart when that child is ripped from my body?"

"You already told him and you were already going to do it."

"I hadn't meant to tell him. And it was different when I wasn't going to marry him. It made sense when I wasn't going to marry him. I can't do it like this."

"Marry him."

"And if I do? What if I don't want to get rid of the child?" Elphaba had never intended to have children. She didn't think she could be a mother. But she remembered how Nanny had once told her how her mother had thought about drowning her. What had this child ever done to her but exist?

"Then you're stuck with him. You can still help us, but you'll be trapped in that castle for the rest of your life, raising that child. And you can't fight with us when you're pregnant. You realize that, right? We need you in this fight."

"No you don't. You need him." Elphaba felt trapped, but the feeling in her belly told her exactly what she was going to do. It was the only thing she could do. "Fine. I'll marry him. But the child is my decision. And I'm having it."


	17. Chapter 17: Unintended Consequences

**Chapter 17: Unintended Consequences**

Before they left for the Vinkus the day after graduation, Elphaba snuck away and made one last visit to Kal. "The innkeeper, right?"

"Right. Don't go right away. We don't need you arousing suspicion. Fae, I urge you to reconsider your thoughts on the child, though. You wanted to fight. This child makes that difficult."

"I don't care."

"And you're fine being his wife? The mother of his children?"

"Child. And I never said I'd raise it. I said I'd have it." She had made the decision to keep it, but beyond that she wasn't quite sure. She still wanted to run when the war was over. If she left the child with Fiyero, she knew he or she would be well cared for.

"Interesting. That's an idea."

"I don't want to be tied down."

"I know that. Now," Kal turned and grabbed something off a shelf, "I have a parting gift for you." He handed her a dusty old bottle of wine. "For your wedding night."

She took it. "Thank you."

"You've done well, Fae. Better than we ever thought. I wish you the best of luck on the next leg of this. War is coming now, Fae, and because of you, we're more prepared than ever."

Fiyero's somber mood from the prior month had been replaced with an almost irritating joy. "I can't believe I'm going to marry you."

"I can't believe it, either." At least that much was the truth.

"How hadn't I thought about the pregnancy loophole?"

"Fiyero, this was an accident. I don't know that I would've wanted to do it on purpose."

"Even if it meant we could spend the rest of our lives together?"

"I didn't want it to happen like this." She was trying to be patient with him, but she was getting anxious. Elphaba knew it wasn't his fault and he wasn't doing anything wrong, but still she was irritable.

"I know, but at least we're together."

"Yes," she forced a smile, "we're together."

"For the rest of our lives."

She nodded, unable to repeat that. Instead, she stared out the train window. "Glinda is not going to make it through this wedding without breaking down at least once."

"I thought she was going to kill me."

"I don't think she was very happy with how this came about." Elphaba recalled the stern look on her roommate's face when she'd told her she was pregnant. That look had, of course, changed when she informed her exactly what that meant. Still, she'd been given one hell of a lecture about her behavior.

"It doesn't matter how." Fiyero took her hand.

"Fiyero?" She wouldn't look at him.

"What?"

"We're still going to send troops to the City? With all of this happening?"

"I had wondered if we should wait."

"No." There was no hiding her intentions anymore. "No. We need to do this now. He probably already knows it's coming. We're ready for it. Munchkinland is ready. If we wait, it's too dangerous."

He seemed taken aback by her ferocity, but nodded slowly. "Sometimes I think you make a better king than I do."

"I was going to help you anyway, Fiyero. Now I'll always help you. I love you, you know."

"I love you, too."

They popped the bottle of wine the night of their wedding, having a few sips before making love, and taking a few more sips after and laughing at the awful taste. But the festivities and stress of the wedding had been too much for Elphaba and she slipped into a deep sleep.

She awoke to a severe pain in her abdomen and the urge to vomit. Was morning sickness supposed to hurt like this? Elphaba leapt out of bed and ran for the bathroom.

Fiyero was behind her in an instant. "Is there anything I can do?"

She groaned. "No."

"Do you want me to sit with you until it passes?"

"I'll be fine. Go have breakfast with your family. I'm sure they want to see you. Tell them I'll be down later."

He seemed reluctant. Fiyero placed a kiss on her head. "You call for me if you need anything."

"I will. I'm pregnant, not crippled. You don't need to wait on me." She waved him away.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed when he returned, but she was curled up on the floor clutching her belly. He bent down and wiped hair away from her forehead. "Elphaba?"

"I told you to go away."

"You've been in here for hours."

"I thought it just seemed like hours," she muttered.

"You're sweating."

"I'm fine."

"Elphaba, this looks like more than just a little nausea. I should get the midwife."

"No. It's probably normal. All sorts of things are going on inside me right now. Any one of them could be causing me a little pain. I'm sure it will pass."

But it didn't. The pain only got worse. She didn't feel the tears when they came, but she felt him wipe them away. By the time the midwife arrived, she could barely breathe through the pain. Elphaba could only make out one or two words before the world went black.

When she woke up, she was in their bed. Fiyero sat in a chair beside the bed, looking shaken. Though she suspected she knew what had happened, she looked to him for confirmation.

"You miscarried."

She had expected him to sugarcoat it. And she hadn't expected anger in his voice. "Oh, sweet Oz."

He stood up. "Elphaba, do you want to tell me anything?"

"What do you mean?"

He sighed heavily. "Elphaba, the midwife told me. You can admit it."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"I wish I didn't know, either. I don't understand it. The midwife said the way you miscarried, the only way that could've happened is if you took the potion. It wasn't natural."

Elphaba froze. "I what?"

"Why did you take the potion, Elphaba?"

She shook her head. "I didn't."

"Elphaba, the midwife said…"

"The wine… oh, sweet Oz, it was the wine…"

"The wine we drank last night? You said that was a gift from a family friend. Are you telling me someone slipped that potion into our wine?"

"It's the only solution. Why would he do this? I told him it was my decision."

"He? What are you talking about, Elphaba?"

She couldn't stand the way he was looking at her. "Fiyero, I need to tell you a story."

 **Author's Note: There are certain plot points I use a lot. This (miscarriage) is one of them. And maybe it seems like a stupid plot device to you. But I want to explain why it comes up so often: the scar. There is a moment, in the chapter "City of Emeralds" in the book where Fiyero sees a scar on Elphaba in a very intimate place. Or at least he thinks it's a scar. When I wrote my first fanfiction (From Elphaba to Fae: The Lost Years, which I've been thinking about doing a rewrite of... sorry about that), I wanted to find an explanation for that, since I was basically explaining everything else (as in the missing five years). That was my explanation. There are some stories where I decided not to go with it, but I'm sure you've noticed there are stories where I do. I was sixteen when I wrote that first story. It was TEN years ago. Every few months or years I come back to this site, to these stories, and to that. I don't know why, exactly. But that scar, that single paragraph in the novel, it stuck with me.**


	18. Chapter 18: Should I Stay or Should I Go

**Chapter Eighteen: Should I Stay or Should I Go**

He listened to her with a stony silence, an occasional shake of the head or "tsk" of his tongue. She didn't look into his eyes. It hurt her too much to see his pain. When she finally finished, they sat quietly for ten minutes, Fiyero's head in his hands. Finally, he said to her, "None of this was real."

"That's not necessarily true," she insisted.

"You're good. I never thought someone like you would go so far just for political gain. Sweet Oz, you gave yourself to me. You married me. But you planned to leave."

"It wasn't for political gain for myself, Fiyero. This is about more than just the two of us."

"You're telling me you never loved me?"

She felt the tear that escaped the corner of her eye, then, and wiped it away furiously, gritting her teeth through the burn. "I think maybe I did love you. My head is so warped that I don't know what I feel versus what I'm supposed to feel anymore, Fiyero." And at that point, she knew. What she hadn't wanted to admit, what was too dangerous to feel. "I do love you."

"And this was your plan all along? Marry me and get rid of the baby? You said you wanted to..."

"No! They did that to me, Fiyero. They told me to take care of it and I realized that didn't want to. I couldn't. My mother wanted to get rid of me when I was born and I could never do that, not when I remembered what my Nanny told me as I grew up. That child did not deserve a death sentence when it never did anything wrong."

He nodded. "I believe that much."

"The pregnancy was not part of the plan. Marrying you wasn't in the plan, either. It just kind of happened."

"Marriages do not just happen!" He shouted. "How could I be such an idiot? All of this time. You walked up to me that day in class hoping to get me into bed and under your spell."

She opened her mouth but he held up his hand. Elphaba didn't protest.

"If your intention was to leave and you want to go, you should go now."

"I don't…"

"Look, our troops are ready, the war is going to happen. You don't need to stay. I'm not going to back out just to punish them for what they did to our child, or you for leaving."

"I realize I don't need to stay. But I want to." It shocked her even as she said it. She could look at Dr. Dillamond's research here. Everything she wanted to do, she could do here, with him. "Fiyero, if they realize you know, they will kill one or both of us. I don't care about myself, but I am not risking your life. Even without that, I want to stay." She wanted to reach out to him, but she didn't want his rejection. Besides, she still felt nauseated.

"Would you have ever told me?"

"I just did."

"You had to."

"I didn't. I could've told you my father, who always told me I should never reproduce, sent the wine. Half of that is true. And it wouldn't be beyond my father to do such a thing if he thought it would stop the spread of sin."

"Then why did you tell me?"

Part of it was that she was still sick and weak. "Because I can't do this anymore. They killed our child, Fiyero. That was not part of the plan and that crossed a line I never wanted crossed. You deserved to know that." She was too dizzy to get out of bed but she wanted so badly to go to him.

"And you really want to stay? Why?"

"Because I want to fight this war beside you."

"And after the war?"

"I'll still be here, if you'll have me."

He looked at her and she could see the tears dried on his face. "And if I keep you around long enough to keep the charade and then I want you gone?"

"That's your prerogative. I won't tell them. They promised me no harm would come to you so long as I did as they told me. But Fiyero, if they knew I was in love with you, I'm dead. I couldn't tell them. I couldn't tell myself."

"I really don't know how to handle this right now."

"I understand."

"My family just thinks you had a miscarriage. The midwife swore she wouldn't tell a soul."

"You can tell them. Let them decide what to do with me."

"That's not their business." He sighed. "I can't just go sleep somewhere else. We're supposed to be on our honeymoon."

"I can sleep on the floor."

"You are not sleeping on the floor. You are not well."

"I don't deserve the bed."

"We're fighting over the floor."

"I know."

He moved towards the the bed, then. "Elphaba, I love you. At least, that person you were when you wanted me to love you."

"That was me. There were times when I wanted to back away and run, but other than that, every single thing I told you, every story, that was me."

"But you used Tibbett's breakdown and the trauma of the Philosophy Club to get to me."

"I did," she told him. "I'm not going to lie to you. Ask me whatever you want."

"You say you love me. When did that happen?"

"I don't know."

"The first time you told me you loved me, did you love me then?"

"I think at that point I cared. I don't know that I loved you. I know I love you now. But I couldn't tell you when it happened."

"So when you came to me that night and we were intimate the first time, you didn't love me? Because I loved you. I hadn't said it yet, because I got this feeling that you were…" He rolled his eyes. "You were distant. But I loved you. You didn't love me then?"

"I didn't. I cared about you, but I did not love you."

"Yet you let me deflower you."

"That's how we're putting it now? Deflower?"

"Well, I took your virginity. We had sex. You'd never done it. That was supposed to mean something. I don't think it did, not to you. What do you want me to say? I don't know if making love is the right word anymore."

"It is the right word. I. Love. You. Fiyero, what I said about it being you then or I'd probably never make love with anyone? That was the truth."

"Did you pretend to enjoy it?" He seemed embarrassed by the question.

"I loved every minute of it," she flushed. "And I loved every time after."

"And when you came to me and you told me you were pregnant…"

"I had never intended to tell you at all. I was going to handle it myself. I'd steeled my emotions, pretended it didn't matter and I had to do what was best for the cause. But then I looked at you, Fiyero, and I couldn't hide from you."

"You loved me then?"

"Yes. I know I did."

"And when I asked you to come out here and teach and you turned me down, what was that? Wouldn't agreeing have been exactly what you wanted?"

"I didn't want to get your hopes up. I didn't want to hurt you. And at that point I still wanted out when this was over. Fiyero, no matter if and when I loved you, I never wanted anything to happen to you. I never wanted to hurt you, you have to believe that."

"You did hurt me."

"I know. Fiyero, if I didn't get you, if this didn't work, they were going to get rid of you. They were going to find someone they could get to and destroy everyone in their way. I couldn't let them. By the time I realized how serious this had gotten and I wanted to stop it, it was far too late."

"Did Glinda know?" He asked suddenly.

"No. She never knew. She thought I was head over heels in love with you from the beginning."

"I feel a little better knowing that. If she couldn't tell, maybe I'm not as clueless."

"You weren't clueless, Fiyero. Every lie I told had the truth in it. Even when I didn't love you, I cared. I didn't know how to love. You showed me."

"And you love me now?"

"I always will," she said quietly.

He took her hand then. "I love you, too, you know. I wish I didn't."

She couldn't take the brokenness in his eyes. "Look, I'll take the floor. Give me a few extra pillows and I'll be fine. Sleep in the bed, Fiyero."

"I guess we could share it…"


	19. Chapter 19: Truth Be Told

**Chapter 19: Truth Be Told**

"I'm waiting to send the troops out until you're better." He told her when she woke up the next morning. They'd slept on opposite sides of the bed not facing one another, something they'd never done in his dorm - though his dorm bed hadn't been big enough to really have sides. "You want to fight beside me and I want you there. I've sent to Munchkinland. They're ready when we are. The midwife said you should be fine in a few days."

She climbed out of the bed, finally feeling able to hold herself up. "I'm so sorry for all of this. When they asked me to do this, Fiyero, I didn't want to. I asked them to do anything else."

"Was it so painful to seduce me?"

"That part was fun. It was painful knowing I might hurt you."

He nodded. "Right."

"Fiyero, remember on the train on the way here when you told me it didn't matter how we got here but it mattered that we had each other?"

He smiled a little at that. "Yes."

She went to him and took his hands. "I still feel that way."

Fiyero glanced down at their hands. "You do?"

Elphaba wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. "I do."

He put a hand on her waist lightly. "That was before."

"It was. And this is now. And right now I'm here and I love you."

"You're not going to give up, are you?" He laughed.

"No. Never. Not on you."

"I love you, Elphaba, but this isn't going to be easy to get past. Trusting you is going to be hard for me. I want to trust you but I don't know that I can."

"I'll never give you another reason not to. From now on, I'll tell you everything. No omissions, no lies, no secret motivations. I'm yours, Fiyero. You can walk away if you want to, send me back to Munchkinland or the City. But I'm not walking away unless you tell me this is over." Elphaba swallowed hard. Finally, she understood the phrase "wearing her heart on her sleeve." Never in her life had she felt this vulnerable, this afraid. If he ended this, she would never love anyone again. She'd survive. She'd move on, but she'd never love like this again. Elphaba knew that much. Elphaba lowered her eyes, trying to hide the tears that stinging her cheeks.

His voice was soft and he lifted her chin with his finger. "Oh, Elphaba, my love, it's not over. Maybe I should end it, but I can't."

She kissed him over and over. "I love you."

"I know," he smiled, wiping away her tears. "And I love you." He picked her up and put her back on the bed. "You need to rest. This is not helping you. I need you next to me when we march to the City." He paused. "And you have a visitor. Glinda hadn't left yet when you collapsed, and she stayed."

"Fiyero, it's not safe for her here. If she stays much longer, she's going to be dragged into this." Elphaba shot out of the bed and got right into Fiyero's face.

"She knows that."

"She does?" Elphaba was surprised. Glinda wasn't one to walk into conflict.

"And she wants to be here. Look, she's been begging to see you since yesterday when I mentioned you'd woken up. What you choose to tell her is your decision. She doesn't know anything. I couldn't tell her. That's not my place."

"Given that I did what I did to you, it is your place if you had wanted to."

"Honestly? I feel a little stupid about it. I'm not keen on talking to anyone about it."

"Oh, Yero, you're not stupid. When people fall in love, they're willing to overlook things. And I was only good at it because I felt for you. If I hadn't, I probably would've been obvious."

"In the beginning, when I was talking to you and I was trying to tell you, sometimes you were a little lost."

She laughed. "I didn't know what you were trying to say. I thought maybe you were telling me, but I didn't want to push you and if I was wrong, I might not get another chance. It's not like anyone had ever tried to flirt with me before."

"Now that surprises me."

"I hadn't exactly put myself out there."

"I'd been interested before you came up to me in class, Elphaba. I just… I knew it couldn't happen so I ignored it. Until you made it impossible."

"Really? Me?"

"Why do you think I begged you to accompany us to the Philosophy Club? I had no idea what I was asking, but I wanted you there."

"I had looked at you, you know. I hadn't spoken to you much, but the diamonds… they intrigued me." She ran her fingers along the diamond on his cheek. "When I was told you were my target, I remember thinking that at least it was someone I found appealing. Maybe… maybe it was always there, with us, this just forced it."

"I like that thought." He squeezed her hand. "Now, if I don't let Glinda talk to you soon, she'll end up bursting in here on her own. I'll go get her."

When Glinda came in, she seemed hesitant. "How are you feeling, Elphaba?"

"Truthfully? Like a terrible person."

"Elphaba, it's not your fault."

"But it is." If she'd told Fiyero, it was time to tell Glinda. "Glinda, when I came back from the City, you knew I was different. And you were right. When I left, Glinda, I went to seek out the rebellion. But when they found out where I was from, they sent me back to Shiz, saying I was needed there."

"What were you thinking? Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?" After a pause, Glinda seemed to realize there was more. "What did you do?" Glinda put her hands on her hips.

"They told me to seduce Fiyero. They told me to watch you. I know you thought it was strange when I started up with Fiyero, and now you know why."

Glinda blinked. "Does he know?"

"He does now."

"Why did they want you to do that?"

"Because he had the power to bring the Vinkus into the fight."

"I thought maybe you were hiding something. But I couldn't understand how. All of the sudden you started that relationship and you jumped in so quickly. It didn't make sense. I just figured you'd fallen hard. Elphaba, you _married_ him."

"I did."

"That's why he was acting funny when he came to me to tell me you'd woken up, isn't it? You only just told him? You waited until after you'd married him?"

She bit her lip. "It was wrong, I know."

"Wrong? Elphaba, it was insane! He must hate you right now. How could you do this? I knew that you were a little bit less emotional than the rest of us, but to make him fall in love with you and not care at all about what you did, that's completely heartless."

"That's where you're wrong, Glinda. I did care. I don't think I did in the beginning, at least not as much as I acted like I cared, but I do love him, Glinda. I don't know that I would've been able to go this far if I hadn't."

"You did all of this just to fight the Wizard?"

"Mostly, yes."

"And how does Fiyero feel about this?"

"He's… hurt. But we're working through it. I do love him, no matter what terrible things I've done to get here."

"And the child? What happened?"

"They saw the child as a liability. They tricked me into causing this."

Glinda shook her head. "This is a lot to take in right now. You haven't been my friend for almost two years. Nothing you have done has been you."

"I was always your friend, Glinda. I was still me. I just had different priorities."

"And now he's fighting a war because _you_ manipulated him. Elphaba, people are going to die."

"This war still needs to be fought, Glinda. That's why I did this in the first place, even if it was wrong. Things need to change and this is the only way. If you don't want to be here, if you want to go, find yourself some place safe. I made sure no harm would come to you."

"You did?"

"I didn't want you involved, Glinda. I didn't want you hurt. I really didn't want Fiyero involved, either, but by the time I realized that, he wanted to be involved."

"And so do I. We're fighting this, Elphaba, no matter what you did. This is too far gone. And this war needs to be fought, like you said. What you did to get us here? That will have to be dealt with another time."

"I love you, Glinda. You really are my best friend."

"I love you, too, Elphie."


	20. Chapter 20: A Time For War

**Chapter 20: A Time For War**

"The Wizard's troops have moved. They're headed this way. We need to decide if we're going to wait until they make it here or if we want to move now and meet his army." Fiyero walked into the room and got right to the point. "Are you ready to fight?"

"I've been teaching Glinda the spells I learned from that book the last few days, we've been practicing. I told you yesterday it was time. I am perfectly fine. I think we need to move _now_ , Fiyero. I don't think fighting here is a good idea. There are too many innocent people."

"Munchkinland has already made their move without waiting for us. We're on opposite sides of the City, though. His armies are going to be divided. I'm surprised they did that without waiting to see what we would do."

"Most of the rebellion is there. They know your armies will fight.."

"There are members of your group everywhere, aren't there?"

"There are some out here, too, you know. Watching to see if the tides changed, what your armies did."

"Will you tell me who they are?"

"Why? Are you going to punish them? I don't think they were aware of what I was told to do."

"You think they weren't? Then what were they watching for? They had to know someone was doing something to change things."

"But did they know exactly what? I don't think they did. I was never allowed to meet anyone else, get anyone's real name. They wouldn't have known because if they'd been found and tortured they could've given the Gale Force information on the other cells and activities. I'll tell you the one person I know of out here if you want, but I don't see it doing you any good. Besides, Fiyero, you're getting distracted and we need to move."

"You're right. I'll deal with that later. The troops have been ready to be mobilized since I returned. It shouldn't take long. I'll send to Munchkinland and we should go. Get what you need and I'll tell Glinda."

It would be a long march, days at least. Though Kiamo Ko was much closer to the City than a lot of Oz, an entire army walking towards the City would be slow going. Then again, the Wizard's troops were walking as well. She and Glinda, however, were to use their sorcery to scout ahead. Elphaba enchanted a broom that she'd found and Glinda created a bubble out of thin air, turning her nose up at the idea of the broom.

Before they separated, Elphaba pulled Fiyero into a tight embrace, afraid to let him go. "If you get hurt, Fiyero, I don't think I can live with what I've done."

"You'll see me tonight, Elphaba. You won't be far. It's not like there's any fighting to be done today. We're at least days away from that."

"I need you to be safe."

"I will do my best, my love." He kissed her hard. "You're the one doing something risky. Maybe I should be worried about you."

"Glinda will be with me. We will be fine."

He hugged her close. "Tonight, then."

"Tonight." She promised.

They were almost ready to turn around when they saw a figure floating in the air, no broom, bubble or any other device. The two women gave each other a look and prepared themselves. It had occurred to them that the Gale Force would send out sorcerers to scout, as well. Apparently, they had. Glinda asked, "Are you sure you can handle this?"

"It's a little late to ask."

As the figure drew closer, both women gasped, realizing it was one they recognized. But Madame Morrible wasted no time and conjured a bolt of electricity that she sent reeling towards them.

Elphaba dropped her broom lower as Glinda moved to the side. They had one extra trick up their sleeve that they knew the Wizard couldn't have. "Now!"

On Elphaba's shout, Birds of all kinds came from behind them, headed for Morrible, ready to dive-bomb her. She relished the shocked look on the old woman's face. That didn't last long as the woman waved her arms and a popping noise indicated a large number of Birds hitting an invisible wall and crashing to the ground. Most of them appeared able to get back up, but there were some that lay motionless on the ground. But Elphaba knew there was no time to mourn and she shot a gust of wind, trying to see what would make it through the wall that Morrible had created. She hoped it went both ways.

Behind her Glinda cried, "Elphaba, careful!" A giant boulder was shooting towards her from the side. In her attempt to duck it, Elphaba tumbled from her broom. Thankfully she was closer to the ground after her last maneuver, but the fall still hurt. She winced as she stood back up and a hand shot out to grab her and whisked her away as fire lit the area she'd been standing in. "Elphie!"

"We have to get her."

"She's backing off."

Sure enough, the old woman was floating away, a pleased smirk on her face as she waved at them smugly.

"That dumb old bitch." Elphaba muttered, watching the majority of the Birds fly behind them.

"You're going to need another broom," Glinda chided.

"I'll be fine."

"If Fiyero finds out you fell, he'll kill me for bringing you along."

"I demanded to come. He knows that. And I'm perfectly fine, see? Just a skinned knee. I'm not even bleeding. I've had much worse in my life. I can't believe I'm in this damned bubble." Elphaba folded her arms across her chest.

"It's safer than a broom."

"And what if someone pops it?"

"You think I haven't thought of that?"

The girls were still arguing when they came across Fiyero. They hadn't stopped marching yet and wouldn't for another hour. But Fiyero stopped them for a moment and pulled his wife into his arms. "Where's your broom?"

"We had a little altercation," Glinda said. "They'd sent their own spies out."

"Are you hurt?"

"No. I fell off the broom. It happens. I was close to the ground, my love."

"I told her she needs to learn the bubble."

"I will not!"

Fiyero laughed. "It's like being back at Shiz with you two. It almost makes me forget…" He lowered his eyes.

"Yero," Elphaba brought a hand to his face. "Don't."

"Yero?"

"It sounded nice," she shrugged.

"Then do I get to call you something?" He asked.

"As long as it's not Elphie."

Glinda made a face. "You two need to stop. I thought you were going through hard times. This doesn't look like hard times."

Fiyero sighed. "I still love her, Glinda. It's trusting her I have a problem with."

She didn't want to talk about this, not now. "We talked about this," she said. "Fiyero, we need to keep moving."

He nodded. "Are you good to walk?"

"Can you stop treating me like a delicate flower?" She demanded.

"I'll take that as a yes."


	21. Chapter 21: Dangers of Love

**Chapter 21: Dangers of Love**

They made camp when there wasn't enough light to continue on safely. The tents were small, even Fiyero and hers. Lookouts were stationed all over the camp and on the borders, ready to warn them should anyone come closer. The Birds roosted in the trees. Other Animals wandered the land, assisting in keeping watch.

"You could've been really hurt today," he told her when they were finally alone.

She was curled up beside him in the tight quarters of their tent, only a blanket beneath them and the rocky ground. "Fiyero, I've been willing to give my life to this for a long time. You knew that from the beginning."

"We weren't married then. You weren't a queen, then."

"You're the king. Your life is far more important than mine. If I die, you can remarry." Quietly she added, "Maybe you can marry someone trustworthy."

"That will come for us in time," he said.

She turned over and blew out the candle that lit the tent. "I will never stop telling you how sorry I am. I just wish you understood how much I love you."

"Elphaba, you had the chance to walk away. I gave you the option. You didn't take it. That tells me more than you know."

"I'm not a good person, Fiyero. I'm wicked. You deserve goodness." Elphaba hadn't turned back to him.

He pulled her against him, his around her waist and his chin resting on the top of her head. "Do you wish you'd never done what you did?"

"No. For several reasons. This war needed to happen. And on a more personal level, I probably never would've been forced to admit that there was something between us. I never would've realized I had the capability to love you."

"The wicked cannot love, Elphaba. You're not wicked."

"They can love, Fiyero. Everyone can. I bet even the Wizard could. I'm wicked, Fiyero. Even though our marriage is already a mess, there are moments when I don't care because I got what I originally wanted and the world is going to change. Yes, my personal life has taken a hit and the most important thing to me is hurt, but I've always been taught not to care about my own wants. The greater good is what matters. I'm just a single person. You're more important because of your status and because you, my sweet, truly are good. And so what I did to you was wrong. But…"

"Elphaba, stop. You're talking yourself in circles."

"I'm sorry. I've been a mess since this started. I just didn't show you."

"I wish you had. I know you couldn't, but I wish I could've helped you."

"If I had told you what I wanted early on, would you have done this?"

"We'll never know. Maybe. But I still would've wanted you."

"I might've wanted you, too, but I wouldn't have had reason to act on it. I've been alone all my life and I never thought that would change. I didn't want it to. Love is dangerous."

"Believe me, I've figured that out."

"Perhaps you're right. The wicked can love. Love itself is a wicked thing." She shivered. Though the weather during the day was warm, at night temperatures were low and the wind blew harshly.

He hugged her closer. "Then you've made me wicked, too."

Elphaba turned back towards him and pressed against him, holding onto his warmth. "Fiyero, you should hate me."

"I can't." He kissed her. "I love you too much."

She felt a tear begin to burn a trail down her cheek and she shook her head over and over. "No, Fiyero. I've done so much damage to us."

"Nothing we can't fix," he insisted.

"You're too good." Her voice broke.

"Elphaba, please don't do this to yourself," he kissed her again.

She kissed him back deeply, finding comfort in the feel of his body. For the first time since their wedding night, they made love, the heat of their bodies keeping them warm. When they finished, Elphaba listened to the noises of the night. "I love you, Fiyero."

"I know. You wouldn't be so upset by what you've done if you didn't."

"We should rest. Tomorrow is another long day."

"You're probably right. And you need to stop hating yourself. I realize neither of us can forget what has been done, but it's going to be easier for us to move past this if we let the anger fade."

"I'm trying, Yero my hero. But I've felt guilty for a long time, long before I told you."

"You called me your hero," he said.

"You saved me from becoming cold and heartless. I didn't see the point in my own life but to further the cause, not until I loved you, Yero."

He kissed her. "I asked you before if I got to call you something."

"My codename was Fae," she murmured.

"I like the way it sounds. I also like the idea of turning that name into something that is good, something for us, Fae-Fae."

She smiled. "I like that, too."

"We're going to be fine, you know. Yes, you may have hurt me. I may wonder if you're going to leave when this is over, but every day I wonder less."

"You didn't think that when I first told you two weeks ago."

"Things change. I needed time. And your behavior has told me enough. Elphaba, we're discussing this topic so much it's just going to make it worse. You said we should rest. Go to sleep."

For the first time, she slept in his arms without worry or guilt.

The next day, she and Glinda set out again. This time they did not encounter any trouble, which made Elphaba slightly nervous.

"Elphie, I'm sure we just missed whatever scouts they sent out. They can only be in so many places at once."

But she wasn't so certain. She was silent as they made their way back to camp, thinking about what they could do to preempt whatever was about to come their way. When they returned, she grabbed her book and began to study it even as they marched.

"Fae," Fiyero said softly, "you've been focused on that for hours."

They'd made camp an hour ago. Only their tent still had a candle lit. "I'm working on something."

A few moments later, a small Bird came flying in, alarming Fiyero so much that he pulled his sword.

"Fiyero! Relax."

"Elphaba, we're in the middle of a war. What do you want from me?" But he was laughing.

The Bird was not fazed. "Our troops will meet theirs in the next day or so, I would estimate."

"You're certain you weren't spotted?" She demanded.

"As certain as I can be."

"Good."

"What is this about, Fae?" Fiyero asked.

"I'll tell you in a moment." She turned back to the Bird. "What are their weapons?"

"They're much more advanced than ours. We don't have nearly so many guns and cannons as they."

"It happens when they refuse to share their technology with the rest of the world. That's not a good sign."

"Elphaba, damnit, I don't like not knowing what you're doing!" Fiyero was clearly getting frustrated.

"Calm down, my love." She waved the Bird away. "I think I have a plan."


	22. Chapter 22: Necessary Risks

**Chapter 22: Necessary Risks**

"I'm still not sure I'm okay with this," Fiyero said.

"Fiyero, usually, I would listen to your concerns, but the only thing you're concerned about is my life, not the fight. Do you understand what we're about to do will weaken their army so much that when your people reach them the fight might as well be over?"

"You've been up all night gathering ingredients and mixing things. And now you're about to fly out with them and you haven't had any rest. Neither has Glinda"

"I can rest when this is over," Elphaba insisted. "When we've defeated them, we can join the Munchkinland forces. Come up on the Gale Force from behind. They'll never win with armies on both sides of them."

"You're a better strategist than I am," he sighed. "What you're doing is risky."

"All I've done since this started was take risks. I took a risk with you. I risked my body, my heart."

"Not your life, Fae."

"If I lose my life for this, Fiyero, so be it. I love you, my sweet, but if my life should be taken today, then I deserve it. If I don't, then it's because of you, because I have you to come back to. Hold on to that. You'll be at risk soon, too, my heart."

He grabbed her and pulled her against him. "Let Glinda handle this alone."

"Why? Is her life somehow less important than mine? Who decides that? Not you, Fiyero." But she kissed him so heatedly she felt her legs almost drop from under her. "I love you. Always."

"I love you, too. Don't do anything stupid because you feel guilty, Fae. Promise me."

"I promise." She grabbed the new broom and climbed on. "Glinda?"

The blonde had been standing there in silence. "I'm ready when you two are done with your fawning."

"I told you that you were being ridiculous," she scolded Fiyero.

He ignored her. "Glinda, promise me…"

"That I'll watch out for her? Done."

And they were off, with thousands of Birds flying behind them. When they got close to their destination, the two women paused, knowing they would have to separate. "You know the plan?"

"You've drilled it into my head. Elphaba, you promise me you'll be careful? I'm not going to get all clingy on you like Fiyero, but you know he's going to lose his head if I come back without you."

"I will do my best." At that, they each took a direct turn in the opposite direction, the Birds splitting on either side of them.

Her stomach twisted when she saw the Gale Force marching nearby. She knew there would be lookouts warning them of her presence even as she flew closer. But they were many. She only hoped that Glinda was as close as she was on the other side. This plan needed to be carried out in tandem.

A fireball came raging towards her and the Birds and she darted quickly out of the way. Knowing she'd been spotted, she threw her arm forward, and the Birds got her signal, diving towards the army.

Some of them fell out of the sky as they went, but Elphaba had put up a shield against the wall she'd seen the other day, so not all of them fell. Enough of them made it. As they pulled themselves back up, she saw minor explosions across the ranks as the bottles dropped from the claws of the Birds. It was working.

Suddenly a loud bang erupted and a large cloud of fire grew within the forces. One of her bottles of hellfire had hit a barrel of gunpowder. Men were falling everywhere, burning bodies creating a stench so strong she gagged. Which is why she didn't see the thunder cloud aiming straight for her until it was far too late. It was meant to pelt her with lightning, but the rain would do much more damage.

She spotted the cloud right before it was above her and threw wind at it, but the spell wasn't strong enough to stop it. Elphaba looked around her, hoping for a way out but seeing none. She was too high to take shelter. She aimed her broom towards the ground as far away from the Gale Force soldiers as she could, jumping off of it and stumbling into a run. Her broom crashed into the ground and splintered. She wasn't sure how she'd make it back, but that wasn't the immediate concern.

Elphaba knew she wouldn't be able to outrun the cloud, but if she could find something to hide under fast enough, she might survive. But all the trees around her were burning from the explosions. It was burn by fire or water, and neither was an appealing idea. She threw her body near a stump and held her cloak above her, quivering.

When the rain came, it fell around her. Some drops hit from the sides, but nothing appeared to be soaking her cloak. She was too concerned with holding it up to experiment with it, but she knew something must've happened to it. The rain didn't last long and she found she only had minor welts on her arms and legs, ones that would heal. What she needed to do now was to evade the Gale Force until Fiyero and his army reached them. While their forces were heavily weakened, they were strong enough to take on a single green girl, no matter her sorcery skills.

She ran until her throat burned and her legs were numb. And even after that, she ran more. Her whole body felt weak and she had almost given in when she saw the Vinkun forces in the distance. With renewed energy, she ran towards them.

Elphaba had almost reached them when she felt a strong wind behind her. Madame Morrible had survived their ambush and she was conjuring something. As the old woman threw fire, Elphaba realized something awful. The woman wasn't aiming at her. She was aiming at Fiyero. "No!" She'd never conjured water before, afraid that if she lost control of it that she'd be severely injured. But she knew the spell. She chanted it and threw a wave at the fireball that was floating towards them.

They collided over her head and water began to rain down on her. She threw her cloak hastily over her head but the water was heavier than the rain had been; it splashed the back of her neck, her side. She covered her face with her hands and rolled to the side. Fiyero's voice cried out near her and she smiled as she fell into darkness.

She awoke in so much pain she wished herself dead.

"Chew this," a woman put pinlobble leaves in her mouth and she began to feel light, like she was floating, but at least the pain had subsided a little.

"Where's Fiyero?" Her voice barely came out more than a whisper.

"Right here." Fiyero pushed through the nursemaids who appeared to be tending to her.

"Why? The Gale Force is weak. You need to be fighting them."

"I sent them onwards. Glinda's leading them. I'm not leaving you. Elphaba, you're lucky you're alive." He brushed her face with a finger. "You've got some pretty bad burns."

She felt someone rubbing ointment on one of her arms, on her side and she winced and tried to move away.

"Don't fight that. This will keep them from getting infected and hopefully will keep the scars minimal," a woman said harshly.

"She's right, Fae. This stuff is strong and it hurts but it's supposed to make healing a lot easier. If you'd had that when you were young, your foot would probably look a lot better."

"You should've left me. The army needs you."

"After you risked your life to save me?" His voice broke. "I'm not going anywhere. Stop fighting, you're only making yourself worse. You need to heal."

More pinlobble leaves were stuffed into her mouth and she chewed obediently. Things got hazy and she fell again into a dreamless sleep.


	23. Chapter 23: Rebuild

**Chapter 23: Rebuild**

Elphaba didn't remember the next few weeks much other than the pain of the ointment and the whispered concerns of her husband. There were moments where she began to walk again, where her burns healed, but it was mostly a blur. The next thing she did really remember was when her best friend came back. She ran to her and hugged her tightly. "I hadn't heard from you since the ambush!"

Glinda examined her. "Your skin looks good. I can barely tell what happened. I saw you right after, and I did not think you would heal this well."

She looked down at herself. There was a little raised skin on her side and her upper arm, but it was the same color as the rest of her. The nurses had told her it was possible even the small scars would go away, but she didn't mind them. "What are you doing here? You're supposed to be leading them. Tell me Fiyero has taken your place."

"Elphaba, it's over." Fiyero said from the corner. She hadn't even noticed he was there. "We won."

"I missed it?"

"Don't sound so disappointed," Glinda laughed.

"I wanted to fight!"

"Did you miss the part about us winning?" The blonde shook her head. "Elphaba, if I hadn't magicked your cloak, you know you'd have died."

"You did that?" She hadn't even thought about what had happened with the thundercloud again. "I hadn't even thought to."

"Neither had I. It was Fiyero's idea. It was the only way he would let you go."

She turned to him. "You've gone on and on about how I almost died saving your life when you saved mine first."

"I didn't risk my own life in the process," he replied calmly, wrapping an arm over her shoulder. "We're not done talking about that," he said. She knew when they were alone that he'd be lecturing her.

"Where do we go from here? What happened?"

"It was quick. Once we defeated the Gale Force troops that we'd weakened, we moved forward to Munchkinland - without you and Fiyero, of course."

"I still think that was a stupid decision. Fiyero, your people needed to see you. They're going to think you put your life above your own."

"The majority of my army saw what you did and how injured you were. I think they understand. You almost sacrificing yourself was more than enough." He squeezed her shoulder gently.

Glinda ignored their quarrelling and continued. "The Munchkinland forces were pretty beaten, but when we got there, they fought with renewed vigor. The battle lasted days, but we won. After that, we took the City. After the troops were divided and sent out, there wasn't much fight left in the City. The Wizard is in a cell in South Stairs."

"And who leads Oz from here? I'm not fond of dictators, but we need someone to guide us."

Fiyero smiled at that, giving Glinda a look. "Do you want to tell her?"

"After I led an entire army," Glinda said quietly, "and took the City, the majority of the rebel leaders seem to think that I should be running Oz. I'm not qualified for that. I'm too young, too inexperienced."

"You know how to talk to people. You're diplomatic. Apparently you can lead armies. You are perfect." Elphaba couldn't believe what she was hearing. She had never heard Glinda doubt herself before.

"This is too much power for one person, especially for me. I've asked some of the rebel leaders to serve as dignitaries. But I don't know how much I trust them. I need you and maybe Fiyero, too."

"I'd be a terrible public figure."

"But you know the rebels better than I do. You can tell me who I can trust. I don't like their methods, but they did win this. I need you."

"We can't leave. He's the king, Glinda."

"Not for long. And he doesn't have to come."

"Yes, I do. I'm not sending her into a shark tank alone."

"Fiyero, I am one of the sharks. Or I was."

"Regardless, I'm coming with you."

She looked at him and laughed. "You know, at some point when all this started, I made a comment to my handler that I was basically your babysitter. I'm starting to think that it's the other way around." Elphaba took Glinda's hands. "I will come. Not for long." With another glance at Fiyero she said, "I belong here."

When they were in their room later that night, Fiyero sat on their bed. "I've been worrying about your healing, but you seem to have recovered."

"I'm getting there." She sat beside him and put a hand on his.

"Then I think we need to talk, really talk, about what you did out there. Why don't you start with what happened and how you got separated from everyone."

"I was on my broom watching the Birds create the chaos we had hoped for. But of course, they had sorcerers in the air, too, and though I dodged a few spells, I panicked. A thundercloud was sent straight at me. I know it was the lightning that was meant to hurt me, and that I might be able to avoid, but the rain…"

"We're lucky no one knew that was a weakness before then or they would've killed you."

"I thought that, too. I got to the ground, but there wasn't a lot of shelter. Everything was burning and soldiers were everywhere. I found a tree stump, but it didn't provide a lot of cover. I threw my cloak up and that's when I realized it was protecting me.

"When the rain stopped, I knew I was in danger from the soldiers, so I ran and ran and ran until I found you."

"But you were followed."

"Right. I saw what she was doing and I knew that the only way to completely stop the fire was with water. I also knew there'd be backlash, but I didn't have time. You were in danger. I didn't even have time to throw the cloak over my head properly. I'm lucky I had it on at all or it would've been much worse."

"So the cloak saved your life twice."

"You saved my life twice."

"It cost me nothing." Fiyero looked at his hands. "Did you do that because you thought you deserved it? Because you wanted to die for me after what you'd done?"

"Maybe. I did it because I loved you. That's as far as I know. I couldn't bear the idea that you would die and it would be my fault. I'd hurt you enough."

"And it wouldn't hurt me to watch you die?"

She'd heard his voice crack but she didn't know what to do. "You'd have been alive. That's what mattered."

"You matter, Elphaba. To me. I know I said that I wasn't sure I could trust you, but after what you did, Elphaba, I couldn't have more faith in you, in us. I wish that hadn't been how you earned my trust back, but…"

She buried her face in his shoulder. "Don't. It's over now. All of it. Oz will rebuild. And so will we."


	24. Chapter 24: Conflict Within

**Chapter 24: Conflict From Within**

Elphaba noticed that Fiyero was quiet as the train reached the City, but she didn't know what to say. He had her hand in hers and occasionally he would trace a finger along her arm, as though he was just remembering she was still there. When she couldn't stand the silence anymore, she said, "Glinda wants me to decide if we should execute him."

"The Wizard?"

She nodded.

"And?"

"And I don't know. I would love to see him dead, but I'm not sure that's the message that Glinda needs to send. That's not what her legacy should be."

"Are you going to see him while we're there? I'm sure Glinda would let you."

"I'm perfectly fine with never seeing him or hearing of him again. I met the man once and it left a bad taste in my mouth for years." The train began to slow and she grabbed her bag, refusing to let Fiyero take it from her. "Carry your own bag."

"I can do both," but she could tell from his tone that he had given in.

A carriage waited at the station to take them to the Palace, though she didn't understand why they couldn't walk. It wasn't far. But she decided not to protest.

Glinda was waiting for them on the steps. "I've been waiting for you two forever! Come, I'll show you your accommodations for the next few days." She led them inside, practically skipping up the steps.

"I'm just going to take a guess and say that she's probably the peppiest leader Oz has ever had," she murmured to Fiyero.

He laughed.

Glinda turned around. "What?"

"Nothing." Fiyero smiled at Glinda reassuringly.

"You two have the guest suite. It's very spacious." Glinda opened the door for them. "I haven't quite made this place my own. It's a little too extravagant. He really did like to be spoiled."

The curtains were silk, so were the sheets. The wood was all mahogany and the rug looked like it had come from thousands of miles away. Her foot sank right into it as though stepping onto a cloud. "This is a bit much, you're right."

"We're meeting in the conference room in an hour. I'll leave you to get settled in."

"You're sure you want to be here for this?" She asked as the door shut them in alone. "I know you don't like what the rebels did, and I don't know that this is the best idea."

"You don't think I can keep my composure? Are you sure you're asking me and not you? You're the one who gets hotheaded. Elphaba, I'll be fine. As long as no one brings up what we did to get here, we'll be fine."

"I do not get hotheaded! And this conversation is about where to go from here, not how it happened." Elphaba sighed. "I don't even want to be here in the first place. I trust that she can handle herself. I just want to take Dr. Dillamond's research and go." It occurred to her how strange that was. It seemed like so recently she had just wanted to be in the City, doing exactly what she was doing and far away from Fiyero. Now she only wanted to live with him in peace and quiet.

Elphaba recognized the man who had sent her back to Shiz the moment she walked in the room. Of course he was here, sitting at that table. He had been the City rebel leader. It only made sense.

A voice behind her said, "Fae?"

Fiyero was now the only one who called her that and he sat beside her. She didn't need to turn around to know who was there, and she almost didn't. Fiyero, however, realized the same thing she did and he had turned around. "Don't speak to my wife."

"Stop it, Fiyero." Elphaba gave him a level gaze and turned her head to Kal. "He doesn't speak for me. I speak for myself. So I'll say this: Don't speak to me."

The old man's face crinkled into the ugliest smile Elphaba had ever seen. "I thought you of all people would understand I did what was best. I needed you in that fight, and it's a good thing you were there or we wouldn't have won. Some sacrifices have to be made."

"I was willing to sacrifice myself. I was not willing to sacrifice someone that didn't know, couldn't know, what they were getting into. An innocent. I guess that's the difference between you and I." Elphaba snapped.

"When did she tell you, huh?" Kal turned to Fiyero. "When it was too far gone for you to back out? She's still playing games with you, just like I taught her. Sleeping with you is just her job."

Fiyero got out of his chair and pushed the old man against the wall. "Elphaba isn't a whore, you sick old man. And the fact that you thought you could pimp her out for your cause is sickening. If you say another word about her, I will make certain you regret it."

Glinda had stood there with a horrified look on her face, but she composed herself quickly. "I'm going to need to ask you to leave," she said to Kal. "Send me another representative. Or don't. I personally don't care as long as you're gone."

He left, but Elphaba couldn't focus for the rest of the afternoon. She didn't listen to what was being said, though she heard Fiyero make a few comments. When they returned to the guest room, she was still in a daze.

"Elphaba? I was making a joke and I thought you'd have appreciated it. I was saying how it's funny how, even though some of the old regime was there, the biggest conflict was one within our own ranks." When she still didn't look at him, Fiyero asked. "Are you listening?"

She shook her head. "Probably not. I was just thinking about earlier. I… I am a whore, Fiyero. I may not have sold myself for money, but I did it for war."

"You told me you wanted to."

"I did. But I wouldn't have done it if not for the cause. I wouldn't have been at the point to want it if I hadn't been trying to get close to you."

"I'm pretty sure most whores have multiple partners, Elphaba. I'm also pretty certain they don't fall in love with the men they sleep with." He kissed her.

She smiled faintly. "You're right." After a moment she asked, "I'm also guessing they don't enjoy sex?"

"Probably not all the time, no."

"Well, then it's settled. I'm definitely not a whore. Because," she pressed her mouth against his briefly, "I really, really, enjoy it."

"Now, I would like to make love to my wife because she wants me to." He kissed her neck.

"Mm, that I do." She unbuttoned his shirt quickly.

As he undid her blouse, he kissed along the places she'd been burned, even if the scars weren't visible anymore. She supposed she'd spent so much time by her bedside he knew each spot intimately. He even kissed the bottom of her foot and she giggled. "I love you," he told her. Her skirt was tied around her and he tugged at the knots.

"I love you, too." She worked deftly and untied the skirt and removed the rest of their clothes.

He pushed her back onto the bed gave her a devious grin, pushing her legs apart. He made his way up from her foot along her calves and her thighs. When he reached where he was going she whimpered at the feeling of his mouth on her. At first he just placed soft kisses, circling. Then his tongue went to work and she threw her head back as he teased the sweet folds between her legs.

She clutched the sheets and cried out as he continued, her focus only on the way his tongue moved against her, inside her. Her hips bucked in pleasure and she moaned.

He slowed and stopped, and she knew how badly he wanted her just from the look in his eyes. When he entered her, she shuddered in delight. Fiyero bent his head down and went back to kissing her neck. By now it shouldn't surprise her that he'd figured out the spots that made her moan. She wrapped her legs around his waist, feeling him press harder with each thrust. The sweet sting of sweat began on her forehead and she grabbed at his shoulder, panting.

And when ecstasy overwhelmed her she let out breathless cries that turned into slow murmurs of his name over and over again. She was lost in him and she never wanted to find her way back.


	25. Chapter 25: There's No Place Like Home

**Chapter 25: There's No Place Like Home**

Discussions the next day were more pleasant and Elphaba managed to get permission to continue Dr. Dillamond's work. Apparently that had been something that Kal hadn't told anyone he'd intended to allow her to do. It made her wonder if he'd intended to let her at all, not that it mattered now. She just wanted to go home.

Home. Suddenly, Kiamo Ko was home. More accurately, though, Fiyero was home. The word "home" had never had a pleasant connotation for her before, but it was a comforting thought now. As the train rattled back towards the Vinkus, she curled up beside him.

He smiled as she did. "So we're done with this. You're coming back with me. Forever. You're still certain that's what you want?"

"I thought you trusted me."

"I do. But I also know how much this mattered to you. You're walking away from it."

"I'm not walking away, though. I'll do my own work where I want to. I don't need to be in the middle of everything. I don't fit in there, anyway. I fit with you."

"I think I'm at the point where I'm glad you did what you did. If you hadn't, I don't think either one of us would be happy like we are now. I realize that wasn't the intended result, but I'll take it."

"Me, too."

The people greeted them eagerly upon their return. Fiyero spent days traveling to the homes of the fallen men from the war and speaking individually to their families to let them know he hadn't forgotten what his men had done. He could only handle one grief-stricken family at a time, so it took him months.

"That's the last one. I know it wasn't a lot, but these were my people and they…"

"I brought them into this war. I wish you'd have let me come with you. You shouldn't bear that burden yourself." But she was bearing her own burden, one she hadn't shared with him.

"It's what I felt I had to do."

"You're a good man, Fiyero. You're always telling me I'd be a better king than you, but I would never have thought to do what you've been doing."

"We make a good team."

"You know, I think we do. But maybe we need another member."

There was a look of hope in his face. "Are you telling me something?"

"Fiyero, I'm pregnant. And this time, nothing's going to get in the way."

"I'm going to watch every food or drink you take get prepared," he said.

"Don't be ridiculous." Elphaba laughed. "You will do no such thing, my love. I will."


End file.
